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And, though I can't put off a woeful mien,
Will be all mirth and cheerfulness within:
As, in defpight of a cenforious race,
I moft incontinently fuck my face.
What mighty projects does not he defign,
Whofe ftomach flows, and brain turns round with wine?
Wine, powerful wine, can thaw the frozen cit,
And fashion him to humour and to wit;
Makes even S**** to disclose his art,
By racking every fecret from his heart,
As he flings off the ftatefman's fly disguise
To name the cuckold's wife with whom he lies.
Ev'n Sarum, when he quaffs it ftead of tea,
Fancies himself in Canterbury's fee,
And S****** when he caroufing reels,
Imagines that he has regain'd the feals :
W******, by virtue of its juice, can fight,
And Stanhope of commiffioners make light.
Wine gives lord William aptitude of parts,
And fwells him with his family's deferts:
Whom can it not make eloquent of speech?
Whom in extremeft poverty not rich?
Since, by the means of the prevailing grape,
Th****n can Lechmere's warmth not only ape,
But, half-feas-o'er, by its infpiring bounties,
Can qualify himself in feveral counties.
What I have promis'd, thou mayft rest affur'd,
Shall faithfully and gladly be procur'd.
Nay, I'm already better than my word,
New plates and knives adorn the jovial board :
And, left thou at their fight fhouldft make wry faces,
The girl has fcower'd the pots, and wafh'd the glafles,
Ta'en care so excellently well to clean 'em,
That thou mayft fee thine own dear picture in 'em.
Moreover, due provision has been made,
That conversation may not be betray'd;
I have no company but what is proper
To fit with the moft flagrant Whig at fupper.
There's not a man among them but muft pleafe,
Since they're as like each other as are peas.
Toland and Hare have jointly fent me word,
They'll come; and Kennet thinks to make a third, 150
Provided he 'as no other invitation,
From men of greater quality and station.
Room will for Oldmixon and J-s be left;
But their difcourfes fmell too much of theft:
There would be no abiding in the room,
Should two fuch ignorant pretenders come.
However, by this trufty bearer write,
If I fhould any other feabs invite;
Though if I may my ferious judgement give,
I'm wholly for King Charles's number five:
That was the ftint in which that monarch fix'd,
Who would not be with noifinefs perplex'd:
And that, if thou 'It agree to think it beft,
Shall be our tale of heads, without one other gueft.
I've nothing more, now this is said, to say,
But to request thou 'lt inftantly away,
And leave the duties of thy prefent poft,
To fome well-fkill'd retainer to a host;
Doubtless he'll carefully thy place fupply,
And o'er his grace's horses have an eye.
While thou, who'st flunk through postern more than
> Doft by that means avoid a croud of duns,
And, croffing o'er The Thames at Temple-stairs,
Leav'ft Philips with good words to cheat their ears.
To LORD HARLEY, on his MARRIAGE, 1713.
AMONG the numbers who employ
Their tongues and pens to give you joy,
Dear Harley! generous youth, admit
What friendship dictates more than wit.
Forgive me, when I fondly thought
(By frequent observations taught)
A fpirit fo inform'd as yours
Could never profper in amours.
The God of Wit, and Light, and Arts,
With all acquir'd and natural parts,
Whofe harp could favage beafts enchant,
Was an unfortunate gallant.
Had Bacchus after Daphne reel'd,
The Nymph had foon been brought to yield:
Or, had embroider'd Mars purfued,
The Nymph would ne'er have been a prude.
Ten thoufand footsteps, full in view,
Mark out the way where Daphne flew :
For fuch is all the fex's flight,
They fly from learning, wit, and light:
They fly, and none can overtake
But fome gay coxcomb, or a rake.
How then, dear Harley, could I guess
That you should meet, in love, fuccefs?
For, if thofe antient tales be true,
Phoebus was beautiful as you:
Yet Daphne never flack'd her pace,
For wit and learning spoil'd his face.
And, fince the fame refemblance held
In gifts wherein you both excell'd,
I fancy'd every nymph would run
From you, as from Latona's fon.
Then where, faid I, shall Harley find
A virgin of fuperior mind,
With wit and virtue to discover,
And pay the merit of her lover?
This character fhall Ca'endifh claim,
Born to retrieve her fex's fame.
The chief among the glittering crowd,
Of titles, birth, and fortune proud,
(As fools are infolent and vain),
Madly afpir'd to wear her chain :
But Pallas, guardian of the Maid,
Defcending to her charge's aid,
Held out Medufa's fnaky locks,
Which ftupify'd them all to stocks.
The Nymph with indignation view'd
The dull, the noisy, and the lewd:
For Pallas, with celestial light,
Had purify'd her mortal fight;
Shew'd her the virtues all combin'd,
Fresh blooming, in young Harley's mind.
Terrestrial nymphs, by former arts,
Difplay their various nets for hearts:
Their looks are all by method fet,
When to be prude, and when coquette;
Yet, wanting skill and power to chufe,
Their only pride is to refufe.
But, when a goddefs would beftow
Her love on fome bright youth below,
Round all the earth fhe cafts her eyes;
And then, defcending from the skies,
Makes choice of him the fancies beft,
And bids the ravish'd youth be blefs'd.
Thus the bright Empress of the Morn
Chofe, for her fpouse, a mortal born:
The Goddess made advances firft;
Elfe what afpiring hero durft ?
Though, like a virgin of fifteen,
She blushes when by mortals feen;
Still blufhes, and with speed retires,
When Sol purfues her with his fires.
Diana thus, Heaven's chafteft queen,
Struck with Endymion's graceful mien,
Down from her filver chariot came,
And to the Shepherd own'd her flame.
Thus Ca'endish, as Aurora bright,
And chafter than the Queen of Night,
Defcended from her fphere to find
A mortal of fuperior kind.