thing to might be a difficult pefwade 'em there were any higher State of Life defign'd for Rational Beings. Well, 'tis now time to com pare thefe fine Rivals one with t'other, and fee which of 'em beft deserves the Honour of a Ladies Love: For the firft, a Fool, (whom for the prefent we'll fuppofe diftinguifh'd from his near Kindred that follow after, a Fop, Beau, &c.)time has been when he flood as fair as any, nay, was fnapt at by the Ladies, and they almoft quar rell'd who fhou'd have him for a Husband: But we wou'd hope 'twas only in thofe Reigns when 'twas fo much the Falhion to get a Wifer Man (or at leaft a Brisker) to fupply his room; and are unwilling to be. the main Chance; in the E-many; it vening for his Diverfion drinks his Pine, or smoks fome hours in a Coffee-house with Com6 pany that pleases him, then comes home and grumbles ar his wife if the Days Expences • have been a half-penny extra ordinary; that will buy his Wife fome good Cloaths to go abroad with him on Holydays, or to a Neighbours Chriftning, hardly elle allowing her to • ftir, and fometimes giving her a Crown, or half a Crown in •her Pocket, of which the muft render an exa& Account: I 'fay, a Lady being to make her Choice, which of these, think ye, is the leaft Evil? And if the likes none of 'em, what fort of Husband muft fhe chufe? A. The Lady's a little diffi. eult to be pleas'd, tho' We con-lieve, how much foever they fefs the feems to have Reason; are flander'd, that many of the however, we can eafily foretell Fair Sex wou'd make choice of The s not in hafte to be Marry'd, him now, tho' nor for that, if the ftays till one offers that's yet for no very good Reafon, not toucht with any of the that they might be Heads ; when Characters the has given. If the he that fhou'd be fo, wanted defires our Advice in Exclufion Brains to be fo: For we fhou'd to all these, she may more eafi-think a prepofterous defire of ly meet with it in our former Oracles, than find the Man who will answer that Defcrip. tion we there give; tho' we believe the World is pretty even for the Quality, as well as for the Number, of both Sexes, and perhaps an Argument for Providence may be drawn from this, as well as that; for were it an eafie matter for Perfons-Exit Fool-Now for Fop, exasly pair'd with excellent who only thinks a little better Qualifications to meet and be of himself than his Elder Bro Happy in one another, and were ther, tho' of the felf-fame Fa moft of the World in fuch Cir- mily, he has as little Wit, cho' eumitances, there would not be more Noife; he wears a fear Domination wou'd hardly outweigh the Inconvenience of his naufeous Folly; befides that, fometimes the Lady may be miftaken, for fome Fools are certainly the moft unmanageable Beafts in Nature; and a wife Woman will not, and need not de fire to have her Will more than a Wise Man wou'd permit her ther inftead of a Fools Cap, he's not fo heavy as his Bro ther, and is hardly fo much Fool as Mad-man; a dancing, finging, empry New-Nothing, juft the fame for a Man that he thinks all Women, and may make an indifferent Play-thing bur avery bad Husband, unlefs you intend to fhare him with all the kind Souls in the Nation. The Beau is only a Fop of the laft Edition, a very Fortune-hunter, and therefore the Ladies muft look to them selves, for he aims as fharply at all the young, as the crazy King of Portugal ufed to do at the Old Women, and hopes as furely to fetch 'em down with his Heart-breakers, as t'other with his Blunderbufs. He's in Love with his Cloaths as much as the Fop with himself, he's all Garniture, and if you'd but let him lay by his Hat and Wig, wou'd no more rake the Law of you for a kick or a Box o'ch' Ear, than a Raffian Pricft can do for beating him, if you firft ftrike his Cap off. Coud a Lady change him as oft as he does his Fathions, 'twou'd be a little fafer vent'ring upon him; but the may have him a better Penny worth, if fhe can find any way to purchafe his Cleaths, for then fhe has all of him, or ot leaft a more Effential Part than either his Soul or Body. For a Coiquean, 'tis an awkward fort of a Creature too, to make a Husband of; but the beft is, he'll be more troublefome to your Maids in the Kitchin chan to you; and befides, you'll be fure to have him much at home, for this two legg'd Turnfpit, ex a&ly contrary to his Brother Brute, can't endure to be out of the way when the Cock has any Ei finess. For a Ecok-learn d Sor, the Truth is, 'tis very hard, to have him always making Love to his Books, and forget his own Flesh and Blood, and it wou'd tempt a Lady to with her felf a Book, (as fhe in the Story) that the might Cow and then be folded down, or turn'd over; but for the moft part thofe Wives have no great reafon to complair, if fome People were not unreasonable; for they have their Husbands always at home, fafe_lock'd up, as their Plate or Jewels, and can refort to 'em for Advice as often as there is occaf on. Laftly, for the fober honeft Man, who mirds the main Chance, &c. one wou'd think he flou'd pleafe; but then he goes plodding about all Day, and Drinks his Pint of Wine, or what's worfe, of Coffee, in the Evening, perhaps too ftays out late at Night; why all this is prety tolerable, nor is what follows very ill; Buys his Wife cod Cloaths, lets her go abroad to fee her Neighbours, gives her Money to spend there; tho' if he has but Wit enough to prevent being begg'd, if the has a good Fortune, she will referve fo much to her felf when he gives the refi, as never to be reduced to fuch Meanrefs. And if the Man has any more, he'll give her a weekly Allowance for Family Expences, without either requi ring or undertaking the Drudgery of trifling Accounts, in fo imali a matter. However, this Cha the Kitchin, like Sir Cotnor calls you Coram Nobis for the odd Farthings in the buying a piece of Beef, as your Lump of a Spark behind the Shopboard; Q.Can Marriage and Chaftity confift together. A. Yes: Why not? As well as a Man may be Temperate at the moft fplendid Barquet: Tho' no Body ever thought this Temperance confifted in not ta[fting a Bit, but in forbearing to eat more than is fufficient. Character is easily enough Diftinguishable from the reft, and we fuppofe the Lady means by it,a Hum-drum,foul-lefs, wooden Fellow, a meer Husband, with no Life, nor Edge, nor Conver-but let's you alone to rule and fation; in a Word a Trading order his Family, buy as many Blockhead, which no Ingenious fine Cloaths as you will, do woman fure wou d be bound Ap- what you will. And if you prentice to for Life, if fhe cou'd wou'dn't have an Angel, where avoid it, as the may eafily do, cou'd you ever find a better? if at her own difpofe, fince And-fo much for this weighty ris almoft impoffible in this Queftion, on which we have Cafe to be cheated; for he's been fomething long, but will fuch a kind of a thing as no make even in thote feven that Difguife will fit him; he must follow, all fent by the fame fhow himself when he puts on Hand. his Holy-day Suit, and 'fteps a Courting, tho' leaving Word whither he is gone, for fear of a Cuftomer) nor can he fo much as ask the grand Queftion out of his Shop-board phrafe,Madam! what do you please to buy? However, even this we think much more tolerable than moft of his Rivals, the Fool is roo bad, the Fop, the Beau, and brisk careless Fellow, will if poffible, beggar himself, and you and all his Family: The Cotquean is a fitter Scullion than a Husband. This plodding Mainchance Fellow will fecure you good Cloaths, and one of the higheft Pews in the Church while he lives, and if he hap. pens to drop off, leaves you another Change, and your Fortune better than ever. Nor have we forgot him that we left plodding in his Study, whom perhaps fympathy makes us inclin'd to vote for before all the reft. He's no Fool, tho' he looks like one: He's generally Sound and Honeft, fo are not Fop and Beau; he plagues you not in Q. Is'c lawful to keep ones felf a Virgin, or is Virginity a Vertue. A. Not fo faft MadamHere are two Queftions wide enough from one another; for many things may be lawful that are not Vertues, tho' to be fure no Vertue but is lawful; and yet even their Circumftances make fo great a Difference, that that may be Lawful, nay a Vertue in one, which wou'd be nei ther in another. And in both Cafes you know your self beft, and therefore are fitteft to An fwer your own Queftion. QIs Virginity of Marriage moft Excellent? A. To be fure the Monks are for Virginity, because 'tis most like the Angels (So Angels Love; fo let 'em do for me !) but at the fame rate they must keep us from Eating and Drinking, unless they cou'd find Manna for our Food. But certainly when Man was in Paradice, he was in the moft Excellent State his present Nature is capable of, and this was Marriage, not Virginity, it being not good for Man to be alone, even in that Happy PlaceA rare Habitation for a Hermit, had it been beft for him to continue fo. If it be faid, this was only for Peopling the World, the fame ftill holds; whereas if the other fhou'd obtain, there wou'd be an End on't in the next Generation: If 'tis faid there's no Fear we hope fo too, how ever this wou'd be a direct and certain Tendency of that Doarine, if believ'd and practic'd; as in effect it began to appear pretty plainly about the Fall of the Roman Empire, when fo many Men and Women ran into Holes and Wilderneffes that the Empire was unpeopled, and had not Hands enough left to defend it from the Irruption of the Barbarous Nations, as the Hiftorians of those Times acquaint Q. Why may not a Woman, without any Impeachment to her Modefty, suffer a Man to Kifs her often, as well as to fhake Hands with her? A. Are Kiffes infipid ftill? -But to let that Unlucky Queftion alone, tho' only to come to another: If the Innocence of applying Lips to Lips be argu'd from that of applying Hands to Hands-dos wỡ sŵ Ladies, you know the meaning. ~ · I am a Trader in the World, yet tho' I fell my Goods, I would willingly act like an honeft Man as to my • Soul ! fuppofing therefore our Commodities to be capable of a three-fold Price confciona bly 1 bly stated with a gradual Ad- ift. May I ask beyond the my loweft price, which rather than turn away a Cuftomer I would take, fhou'd be higeft Price, thereby to ob-d. I tell him, being pofitive ly demanded as before, he fhall have it for 8d. or gd.or perhaps with a Mental_Refervation, that 8d. is my loweft price, meaning that I will yet make him? A. Equivocations and Mental Reservations are both abfolute tain it, because people commonly expect a thing for lefs than I ask at firft; or grant ing this Lawful, fuppofe I meet with a Chapman both foft and Ignorant, and I alfo not knowing him to be fuch, ask him beyond my highest Price, and gain it, is this Ex-ely Unlawful, as our Proteftant tortion? If fo, how fhou'd I Divines univerfally hold, howmend it at prefent, and pre- ever, we think there's a wide vent the like for the fu- Difference between those Jesuici• cure? cal Trikcs, which wou'd deA. If there be three prizes ftroy all Truth, and anfwering of the fame Goods, fuppofing directly and openly to every you do not always or often ob- Queftion of whatever Nature tain the highest price for it, that is put unto you, when in you may yet have fufficient many Cafes fhou'd you either Gain in the Sale thereof: For do fo, or fay nothing at all, the which Reason we think it both worft wou'd be taken for granmoft fafe and most honeft ne- ted. In the present Difficulty, ver to ask beyond the higheft tho' your Chapman demands po tho' fome Cafuifts are of Opi- ficively the loweft price you nion, that in fome Cafes this can fell your Goods for, you may be Lawful, as fuppofing are by no Law, nor by comthe Buyer of fuch an Extrava-mon Equity oblig'd pofitively gant Humor, that He'll like to anfwer him. You are not nothing, tho' never fo Good, upon your Oath, nor are you unless you put a high price up bound to speak the whole Truth, on it. But then they add, that tho' you must the Truth, and if you can gain your price, you are nothing but the Truth: to give him back the Overplus, It's therefore an easie matter to it being certainly a Sin to take fhift the Anfwer, and yet fo as more for any thing than the for the most part to give Satifutmost Value. faction, you may juftly and truly fay 'tis worth more than he bids for it, if capable of different Prizes, and he bids but the very loweft, or what's indifferent; nay we think you may fay he fhall have it for fuch a price above the loweft, which he may take for a pofitive Answer to his Question, Q. Am I oblig'd when deminded to tell my loweft price? As when my Chapman fays, What is your loweft price, or you will not fell it? Muft I anfver pofitively, or ufe fuch Equivocations and Mental Reservations as are generally used? As fuppofing tho' |