Page images
PDF
EPUB

ment the breeze blew fresher. I was precisely in that part of the grove nearest to the lodge; and I stood still for a moment, looking towards it, and trying if I could discern any individuals in the portico or verandah.

"The murmur of rural sounds which arose from the valley was dying away as the evening advanced, the song of birds had ceased, and the lowing of the cows belonging to the cottagers had almost died away; all became still but the beatings of my wayward heart: for I knew that I was doing wrong by lingering in this place, and yet I could not resolve to leave it. The night advanced, the shades became deeper; and suddenly I saw the whole lodge illuminated, while strains of sweet music, as if proceeding from horns and clarinets, reached my ear.

"If I had been fixed to the spot before this by the power of my wayward fancies, I felt now more and more riveted to the place. I stood listening in eager attention, I know not how long, neither can I say how long I might have staid, when suddenly I was startled by the barking of my dog. A moment afterwards I heard approaching steps, and not waiting to ascertain the direction of these sounds, I quitted the tree against which I had been leaning, and fled towards home, and, as it happened, in the precise direction from which the person was approaching, although the winding course of the wood-walks had in some degree misled my ear.

"In consequence of this, I was presently brought close to the person from whom I meant to escape; and, dark as was the wood, I immediately perceived that this person was no other than the young stranger whom I had seen the day before.

"I was not so lost to a sense of right and wrong, as not to be ashamed at being thus surprised in the neighbourhood of the lodge; but the comte soon contrived to restore my self-complacency, and even to bring me to acknowledge that there would be a chance of meeting me another time in this same place. Thus I yielded to temptation, and proceeded, step by step, from one offence to another.

"The comte accompanied me to the gate of my father's garden; but there he took his leave, without at

tempting to come in. And here was a sufficient proof, had I needed additional proof, that he, as well as myself, was sensible he was doing wrong; and I ought to have taken his resolution of not entering with me into the house as a hint that he was fully aware of my imprudence in being with him, even thus accidentally as it seemed, had I chosen to reflect. But reflection suited me not at that time. I entered trembling into the garden, and looked anxiously towards a favourite walk of my father's, fearing to see that dear parent pacing it up and down in a meditative mood, as he often was accustomed to do at this hour of the evening, while waiting for his supper.

"But ah! I needed not to fear. Alas! alas! this sight I thus so wickedly dreaded to see was never more to be seen by me. Never, never from that hour, did your footsteps, my beloved father, trace your accustomed path in your beloved garden, or visit the wood-walks wild in which you so much delighted. I, your daughter, dreaded to see you in your usual place; I hoped you would be out of my way; and my wicked desires were granted. You had already lived long enough for your child; your guardian care was become a burden to her; I wished to be relieved from it; and my wish was granted.

"Oh, sin! sin! how dreadful are the effects of sin!parricide is one of the awful evils in its dreadful train. Yet I did not murder him: no, that horror was spared me, kindly spared me. I did not break his heart. He knew not of my offences; he believed me all he wished. It was the stroke of love which terminated his existence -in mercy terminated it, before he was aware of the dishonour of his child.

"But to proceed with my narrative while reason and strength are left me. As I said before, I saw not my dear father where I expected to see him, but I had no apprehensions. I went to the house, and entered the little vestibule, and into the study; and still not seeing any one, I went up stairs, hearing voices and seeing lights above. And oh! conceive what was my horror and amazement to see my father stretched on a bed, pale and deathlike, without sensibility or motion, madame d'Esten and others being gathered around him, while an old leech or

village doctor was in vain endeavouring to draw blood from veins which had been deeply opened in both arms and in his temple.

"It was with difficulty that I could refrain from uttering a shriek as I entered the room, and more than a minute before I could comprehend what all this meant, or could be made to understand that my poor parent, having been praying with a dying man in the village, had returned to his house in his usual health to all appearance, but had not sat an hour in his study, before he was heard to call for madame d'Esten; and ere she could come to him, he had fallen, apparently without life, from his arm-chair upon the floor.

"And has he not spoken since?"

666 Yes,' said madame d'Esten; 'about a quarter of an hour since he revived a little, opened his eyes, and called for his daughter.'

[ocr errors]

"He asked for me!' I exclaimed, and I wasHere I stopped: I could utter no more; but, throwing myself on my knees, close to the pillow of the lifeless saint, I prayed, I supplicated, I besought, I frantically besought, only one word-one dying word-one blessingone single blessing. And 0, what resolutions did I then make! how did I deprecate my miserable meeting with the comte, and the frivolous, the guilty conversation in which I had indulged him! Had I returned but one quarter of an hour sooner, my father! my beloved father!' I said, 'and I might have had thy blessing!'

"As I proceeded to address the cold, the silent, the speechless frame of my father, on which death had now too plainly set his terrible signet, I became more and more frantic ; and when the persons present would have closed the eyes and settled the limbs, I sprang from my knees, clasped my arms round the body, and was relieved by a fit of total insensibility, from which I did not recover till the surgeon, who had been sent for in vain for my poor father, afforded me some relief by taking a quantity of blood from my arm.

"And now, my child,-for it is for thee I retrace these sorrowful memorials,-I must be spared any very particular detail of the events which immediately followed. My beloved father was committed to the dust by the side

of my mother; and some months afterwards, the comte de Barfleur, having renewed his acquaintance with me, and discovered that I had a sense of honour (to use the word in the commonly accepted meaning) not inferior to his own, used such means to induce me to become his wife, that I consented, and was led by him to the altar-in the village church, much to the discomfort of many of my father's friends, and directly in contradiction to the opinion of madame d'Esten, who never liked the comte, and assured me that I could have no prospect of happiness with a friend of the marquis de Nemours.

"Immediately on my marriage, Madame d'Esten left the valley, and I was taken by my husband to the lodge, where the duke and his companions still were, though preparing to depart.

"Since my poor father's death, I had lived in great retirement, and had never been introduced to the duke de Nemours or to any of the family at the lodge, the intentions of the comte respecting me not being generally understood by them. I never shall forget the uneasy sensations which I experienced at the moment in which I kissed the cheek of madame d'Esten, and hung on her maternal breast-at the instant in which I was about to leave her and the house of my fathers, to go among strangers, to make new friends, to acquire new habits, and to experience new trials. But I had chosen my own lot; it was a brilliant one; and if it did not prove a happy one, I have none to blame so much as myself.

I certainly had some objection to go to the lodge, having conceived a prejudice against its inhabitants: but it seems that the comte wished to show his bride, as an excuse for doing what the duke had called a very foolish thing; and as he assured me that I should see none but persons of honourable character at the lodge, I consented to his wishes.

"I had been told that there were several ladies in the party; and one of these being a sister of the duke, and the widow of a nobleman in France, and the others, wives of gentlemen who were with them at the lodge, Í tried to think, though against conviction, that all would be well, and accompanied my husband without further opposition.

"It was in that lodge, in that abode of splendid vice and misery, that I first made my entrance into high life, and first had an opportunity of observing, that happiness is not always combined with splendour, and that fine manners as often disguise evil passions as they add to the charm of better feelings.

"We were in a district where wheel carriages were of little use. I, therefore, though a proud and noble bride, left my father's house on foot, and not without many tears. Every shrub and tree, and every near and distant prospect, reminded me of some scene of childhood, and of some dear friend from whom I must now be for ever parted on earth. When we had passed the dingle, and come out on the alp in front of the lodge, I was, however, speedily reminded of my new honours, for the duke de Nemours, and all the noble party, were waiting to receive us in the portico. I was saluted with a sound of horns, clarinets, and other music; and a band of the female servants of the lodge (among whom were the two women who were my chief attendants during my second visit to this dreadful place) were prepared to strew flowers in my path, being themselves dressed in white, and wearing garlands of roses.

"As I approached the portico, the duke and his sister (who was any thing but the respectable lady I had expected to see) stepped down to receive me; and, while I trembled at the opinion he might form of the country girl who had thus risen to high degree, he suddenly turned to my husband, and said, in a low voice, 'Indeed, Theodore, I now indeed cannot wonder; adding something about engagements broken, which I did not then understand, but which I afterwards learned referred to some contract of marriage into which the comte had entered before he left France.

"Such was my reception from the duke, who was a man of the first fashion, and who possessed a physiognomy which, for animation and variation of expression, would afford a subject for constant speculation to those who feel an interest in deciphering the human countenance, and find a pleasure in being baffled in the attempt.

"Madame de Portalier, sister of the duke, was evi

« EelmineJätka »