And fome fhall admire his conying wit,

For many good groats his tongue shall flit.
But, fpight of the Harpy that crawls on all four,
There fhall be peace, pardie, and war no more.
But England must cry alack and well-a-day,
If the fick be taken from the dead sea.
And, dear Englond, if aught I understond,
Beware of Carrots from Northumberlond.

*

*Carrots fown Thynne † a deep root may get,
If fo be they are in Somer set:

Their Conyngs mark thou; for I have been told,
"They affame when young, and poison when old.
Root out thefe Carrots, O thou §, whofe name
Is backwards and forwards always the same;
And keep close to thee always that name,
Which backwards and forwards

is almoft the fame.

And, England, wouldst thou be happy ftill,
Bury those Carrots under a Hill **

*The dutchefs of Somerfet.

Thomas Thynne of Longleate, efq; a gentleman of very great estate, married the above lady after the death of her first husband Henry Cavendish earl of Ogle, only fon to Henry duke of Newcastle, to whom the had been betrothed in her infancy.

As

EPIGRAM.

1712.

S Thomas was cudgel'd one day by his wife, He took to the street, and fled for his life: Tom's three dearest friends came by in the fquabble,

And fav'd him at once from the fhrew and the rabble;
Then ventur'd to give him some sober advice
But Tom is a person of honour so nice,

Too wife to take counfel, to proud to take warning,
That he sent to all three a challenge next morning:
Three duels he fought, thrice ventur❜d his life;
Went home, and was cudgel'd again by his wife.

CORINNA.

1712.

THIS day (the year I dare not tell)
Apollo play'd the midwife's part;

Into the world Corinna fell,

And he endow'd her with his art.

But Cupid with a Satyr comes;

Both foftly to the cradle creep;

Both ftroke her hands, and rub her gums,
While the poor child lay fast fleep.

Then Cupid thus: This litle maid

Of 'Love shall always fpeak and write.

And I pronounce (the Satyr faid)

The world fhall feel her fcratch, and bite.

Her

Her talent fhe display'd betimes;

For in twice twelve revolving moons,
'She feem'd to laugh and fquall in rhymes,
And all her geftures were lampoons.

At fix years old the fubtle jade

Stole to the pantry-door, and found
The butler with my lady's maid:

And you may fwear the tale went round.

She made a fong, how little mifs
Was kifs'd and flobber'd by a lad:
And how when mafter went to p-,
Mifs came, and peep'd at all he had.

At twelve a wit and a coquette;

Marries for love, half whore, half wife.
Cuckolds, elopes, and runs in debt;
Turns authorefs, and is Curll's for life.

TOLAND'S INVITATION to DISMAL, To dine with the CALVES-HEAD CLUB *. Imitated from HORACE, lib. I. epift. 5.

IF, deareft Difmal, you for once can dine

Upon a fingle difh, and tavern-wine, Toland to you this invitation sends,

To eat the calves-head with your trusty friends.

*This poem, and that which follows it, are two of the penny papers mentioned in Swift's Journal to Stella, Aug. 7. 1712. They are here printed from folio copies in the Lambeth Library.

Sufpend

Sufpend a while your vain ambitious hopes,
Leave hunting after bribes, forget your tropes.
To-morrow we our myftic feaft prepare,

Where thou, our latest profelyte, shalt share :
When we, by proper figns and symbols, tell,
How, by brave hands, the royal traitor fell;
The meat fhall reprefent the tyrant's head,
The wine his blood our predecessors fhed;
Whilft an alluding hymn fome artist fings,
We toaft, "Confufion to the race of kings !"
At monarchy we nobly fhew our fpight,
And talk what fools call treafon all the night.

Who, by difgraces or ill-fortune funk,

Feels not his foul enliven'd when he 's drunk?
Wine can clear up Godolphin's cloudy face,
And fill Jack Smith with hopes to keep his place:
By force of wine, ev'n Scarborough is brave,

Hal

grows more pert, and Somers not fo grave; Wine can give Portland wit, and Cleveland fenfe, Montague learning, Bolton eloquence:

Cholmondeley, when drunk, can never lofe his wand; And Lincoln then imagines he has land.

My province is, to fee that all be right, Glaffes and linen clean, and pewter bright; From our myfterious club to keep out spies, And Tories (dress'd like waiters) in disguise. You shall be coupled as you beft approve, Seated at table next the men you love.

Sunderland, Orford, Boyle, and Richmond's Grace, Will come; and Hampden fhall have Walpole's place.

VOL. I.

G

Whar

Wharton, unlefs prevented by a whore,
Will hardly fail; and there is room for more.
But I love elbow-room whene'er I drink ;

And honest Harry is too apt to stink.

Let no pretence of business make you stay;
Yet take one word of counsel by the way.

If Guernsey calls, fend word you 're gone
abroad;
He'll teaze you with King Charles and Bishop Laud,
Or make you faft, and carry you to prayers:
But, if he will break-in, and walk up ftairs,
Steal by the back-door out, and leave him there;
Then order Squafh to call a hackney-chair.

PEACE

AND

DUNKIRK;

Being an excellent new SONG upon the Surrender of DUNKIRK to General HILL. 1712.

To the Tune of, "The King fhall enjoy his own again."

I.

SPIGHT of Dutch friends and English foes,
Poor Britain fhall have peace at last :

Holland got towns, and we got blows;
But Dunkirk 's ours, we 'll hold it faft,
We have got it in a string,

And the Whigs may all go fwing,

For among good friends I love to be plain;
All their falfe deluded hopes

Will or ought to end in ropes;

But the Queen fhall enjoy her own again.

Right Hon. Henry Boyle, mentioned twice before.

II. Sun