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Why are thy chests all lock'd? on what design?
Are not thy worldly goods and treasure mine?
Sir, I'm no fool: nor fhall you, by St John, 126
Have goods and body to yourself alone.

One you fhall quit, in fpite of both your eyes----
I heed not, I, the bolts, the locks, the spies.
If you had wit, you'd fay, "Go where you will,
"Dear spouse, I credit not the tales they tell :
"Take all the freedoms of a marry'd life;
"I know thee for a virtuous, faithful wife."
Lord! when you have enough, what need you

care

How merrily foever others fare?

Tho' all the day I give and take delight,
Doubt not, fufficient will be left at night.
'Tis but a juft and rational defire,

To light a taper at a neighbour's fire.

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There's danger too, you think, in rich array,
And none can long be modeft that are gay.
The cat, if you but finge her tabby skin,
The chimney keeps, and fits content within;
But once grown fleek, will from her corner run,
Sport with her tail, and wanton in the fun; 145
She licks her fair round face, and frisks abroad,
To show her fur, and to be catterwaw'd.

150

Lo thus, my friends, I wrought to my defires
These three right ancient venerable fires.
I told 'em, Thus you fay, and thus you do,
And told 'em false, but Jenkin swore 'twas true.
I, like a dog, could bite as well as whine,
And first complain'd, whene'er the guilt was mine.
I tax'd them oft with wenching and amours,
When their weak legs fcarce dragg'd 'em out of

doors;

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155 And

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And fwore, the rambles that I took by night,
Were all to spy what damfels they bedight.
That colour brought me many hours of mirth;
For all this wit is given us from our birth.
Heav'n gave to woman the peculiar grace
To spin, to weep, and cully human race.
By this nice conduct, and this prudent course,
By murm'ring, wheedling, ftratagem, and force,
I still prevail'd, and would be in the right,
Or curtain-lectures made a restless night.
If once my husband's arm was o'er my fide,
What! fo familiar with your spouse? I cry'd:
I levied first a tax upon his need;
Then let him----'twas a nicety indeed!
Let all mankind this certain maxim hold,
Marry who will, our fex is to be fold.
With empty hands no taffels you can lure,
But fulfome love for gain we can endure;
For gold we love the impotent and old,
And heave, and pant, and kifs, and cling, for gold,
Yet with embraces curfes oft I mixt,

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176 Then kiss'd again, and chid and rail'd betwixt. Well, I may make my will in peace, and die, For not one word in man's arrears am I. To drop a dear difpute I was unable, Ev'n tho' the Pope himself had fat at table. But when my point was gain'd, then thus I spoke, Billy, my dear, how theepishly you look!

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Approach, my spouse, and let me kiss thy cheek; "Thou shouldft be always thus, refign'd and meek! "Of Job's great patience fince so oft you preach, "Well fhould you practife, who fo well can teach. "Tis difficult to do, I must allow,

"But I, my dearest, will inftruct you how.

"Great

190

"Great is the bleffing of a prudent wife, "Who puts a period to domestic ftrife. "One of us two must rule, and one obey; "And fince in man right reason bears the sway, "Let that frail thing, weak woman, have her way. "The wives of all my family have rul'd 195 "Their tender husbands, and their paflions cool'd. "Fie, 'tis unmanly thus to figh and groan; "What! would you have me to yourself alone? "Why take me, love! take all and ev'ry part! "Here's your revenge! you love it at your heart. "Would I vouchlafe to fell what nature gave, 201 "You little think what cuftom I could have. "But fee! I'm all your own----nay hold-----for "fhame! [“ blame." "What means my dear-----indeed-----you are to Thus with my first three lords I pafs'd my life; A very woman, and a very wife. 206 What fums from these old spouses I could raise, Procur'd young husbands in my riper days. Though past my bloom, not yet decay'd was I, Wanton and wild, and chatter'd like a pye. In country-dances ftill I bore the bell, And fung as fweet as ev'ning Philomel. To clear my quail-pipe, and refresh my foul, Full oft I drain'd the fpicy nut-brown bowl; 214 Rich luscious wines, that youthful blood improve, And warm the fwelling veins to feats of love: For 'tis as fure as cold engenders hail, A liqu'rish mouth must have a lech'rous tail; Wine lets no lover unrewarded go,

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As all true gamefters by experience know.
But oh, good gods! whene'er a thought I caft
On all the joys of youth and beauty pait,

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Το

To find in pleasures I have had my part,
Still warms me to the bottom of my heart.
This wicked world was once my dear delight; 225
Now all my conquefts, all my charms good night!
The flour confum'd, the best that now I can,
Is e'en to make my market of the bran.

My fourth dear spouse was not exceeding true; He kept, 'twas thought, a private mifs or two: But all that score I paid---as how? you'll fay, 231 Not with my body, in a filthy way:

240

But I fo drefs'd, and danc'd, and drank, and din'd;
And view'd a friend, with eyes fo very kind,
As ftung his heart, and made his marrow fry, 235
With burning rage, and frantic jealousy.
His foul, I hope, enjoys eternal glory,
For hear on earth I was his purgatory.
Oft, when his fhoe the most severely wrung,
He put on careless airs, and fat and fung.
How fore I gall'd him, only Heav'n could know,
And he that felt, and I that caus'd the woe.
He dy'd, when laft from pilgrimage I came,
With other goffips, from Jerufalem;
And now lies bury'd underneath a rood,
Fair to be seen, and rear'd of honest wood.
A tomb indeed, with fewer fculptures grac'd,
Than that Maufolus' pious widow plac'd,
Or where infhrin'd the great Darius lay;
But coft on graves is merely thrown away.
The pit fill'd up, with turf we cover'd o'er;
So, blefs the good man's foul, I fay no more.
Now for my fifth lov'd lord, the last and best,
(Kind heav'n afford him everlasting reft;)
Full hearty was his love, and I can fhew
The tokens on my ribs in black and blue;

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Yet

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Yet, with a knack, my heart he could have won,
While yet the smart was shooting in the bone.
How quaint an appetite in women reigns!
Free gifts we fcorn, and love what costs us pains:
Let men avoid us, and on them we leap;
A glutted market makes provifion cheap.
In pure good-will I took this jovial spark,
Of Oxford he, a moft egregious clerk.
He boarded with a widow in the town,
A trufty goffip, one dame Alifon.

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Full well the fecrets of my foul she knew,
Better than e'er our parish-priest could do.
To her I told whatever could befal;
Had but my husband piss'd against a wall.
Or done a thing that might have coft his life,
She---and my niece---and one more worthy wife,
Had known it all. What most he would conceal,
To these I made no fcruple to reveal.

Oft has he blush'd from ear to ear for fhame, 275
That e'er he told a fecret to his dame.

It fo befel, in holy time of Lent,
That oft a-day I to this goflip went;

(My husband, thank my ftars, was out of town):
From houfe to house we rambled up and down,
This clerk, nyfelf, and my good neighbour Alfe,
To fee, be feen, to tell and gather tales.
Vifits to ev'ry church we daily paid,
And march'd in ev'ry holy masquerade;
The stations duly, and the vigils kept;
Not much we fafted, but fcarce ever slept.
At fermons too I fhone in fcarlet gay;
The wafting moth ne'er spoil'd my best array;
The cause was this, I wore it ev'ry day.

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