Coun. 'Tis woman's privilege; 'tis the salt Ven. There's a proud step, the frown of a of the earth. grandee! Tor. He must be bribed. I'll lead them Poh! I'll be one next week! I'll learn the step! from the scent; I'll give as fierce a frown--as cool a stare; [Aside. Look dignity with any dake alive. I'll rhapsodize the fools. CURIOSITY! True, lady, by the roses on those lips, The merriest masquer underneath the moon! morning shawls; and by their pillow sits, elling delicious tales of-lovers lost, air rivals jilted, scandals, smuggled lace, yawn, I'll strut with all the blood of Charlemagne ! Must I stay here all night? My noble father; there's a hunting lodge, will, [south, he hundredth Novel of the Great Unknown! nd then they smile, and rub their eyes, and Consuls, commissioners-east, west, north, I will provide for them. Lead on, my Lord! Breathe sweet, ye flutes! Ye dancers, lightly [A Dance his heard within. nd wonder what's o'clock, then sink again; w down to sovereign CURIOSITY! move, For life is rapture, when 'tis crown'd by love! SCENE II-A Saloon, decorated for a Féte, Coun. She will be here by-and-bye. Seek Ste. The knave has spirit, fire, a cunning for her, Bernardo. tongue; n it be he? and yet, that countenance. [Aside. Coun. Your Highness sups with us? We have a dance; hurried thing. My daughter will return. [A Tumult is heard outside. The Dancers retire.] Coun. What can be the meaning of all this noise? Street serenaders! Voices prodigiously high! Tor. But set in a prodigiously low key. A quarrel among the footmen. [The Noise increases. Ven. They are breaking into the house. Worse and worse. [He hurries to the Door. Tor. [Listening]-It's more like breaking out of prison. A bravura of bars, with a running accompaniment of chains-linked sweetness long drawn out." [Lorenzo's voice heard outside, through the Clamour. Lor. The Count will see me. The Count ould he were in the dungeon-Renegade! shall see me. Out of my way, scoundrelsAside. I will cut the throat of the first that stops me. [He bursts into the Saloon, forcing the Attendants before him. us Ste. I'll see that girl. Truth, stain'd and scorn'd by man, kes woman's heart its temple. [Aside] To your dance?— -while there's freshness in the open sky, ence in night, fragrance in breathing flowers, music in the murmur of the waves!— walk in the garden. Leave me :-I'll come back Lor. Count, I come to-[Sees Torrento] supper time. -I'll know the truth this night.-Oh! you here, Sir.-Give me my letter this [Aside he goes. instant." Tor. What do you mean? I have no let-hundred dozen of that guitar-scraper, that ter.-What, in the name of confusion, brings sighing Cavaliero, that pays me my wages now, you here?-You'll destroy your own scheme. and be hanged to him. My master! [Sees Lorenzo, and runs out [TORRENTO glances over the Letter.] Tor. "Five hundred crowns more."-[Aside]] Psha! contemptible! [Aside. Lor. All's safe, en. [Aside] - Count, I make no apology. I have come to render you the most essential service;—to warn you, that you are on the brink of disgrace,-that your family are about to be plunged into contempt, vexation and shame, that this marriage is-a mockery! and this Prince-an impostor! Tor. An explosion! All's over-I have nothing to do but to make a run for it.-The door crowded.) [Aside]-Count, you can't believe this? You should know me better. Lor. What devil owed me a grudge, when I wrote that letter. [Aside Ven. I should like to see the inside of that paper, Sir. Tor. Bad policy, that. [Aside] No, spare him. [In his ear] Merely a begging letter: "Pressure of the times-tax upon pipe-clay1· deficiency of shoes." Beginning, as usual, with sycophancy, and ending with supplication. Ven. Here's a discovery! An earthquake! Is this possible? [To Torrento]-Why, he en. [Peeping over his shoulder, readi has not a word to say in his defence. No “Scoundrel!" A very original compliment. Prince!-Yet I thought I could not be mista- must see that letter. [He seizes it, and reca ken, he was so monstrously impudent.-There "Scoundrel!" Nothing very sycophantic v was something in old Stefano's hints, after all, Lor. [Attempting to obtain the LetterKnow you better! Sir, I don't choose to ex-Count, I must insist. That letter is mise tend my acquaintance in your line at present. written for the purpose of relieving you fre The world is full of impostors! all future trouble on this painful subject Tor. Count, it is impossible. Private c respondence-seal of secrecy-tale of distress [Reaching at the Lea Ven. [Reads]-"Scoundrel!"Tor. Confound it! You have read that thre Coun. Can I believe my eyes! - He seems mightily cast down. [Looking at Torrento. Ven. Aye-cast) for transportation. Tor. The girl's worth fighting for. I'll battle it out. [Aside. To Lorenzo]-Sir, my insulted honour scorns to defend itself but by my sword. Dare you draw? times. Ven. [Reads]-"I am determined to [He half draws his Sword. no further interest in Count Ventoso's family Lor. [Bursting into a contemptuous Laugh] -Very proper; just what Count Ventoso wisa Draw! and with you! Go, draw corks.-The devil take his impudence! Begone, Sir! Lor. There there, read no more. T was my entire object. [Interposing] Te that letter. Ven. [Reads]-"I have abandoned all p sonal respect for that pedigree of fools." Pi Coun. Fools! A libel on the whole no Tor. The Captain's in a hopeful way. [ 45 ها Husband, throw th Coun. There will be suicide; I shall faint. Tor. Countess, I respect your delicacy. [Sheathes his Sword] You shall have proof irresistible of my rank and honour. You, Sir,| shall hear of me to-morrow. [To Lorenzo. Lor. Count and Countess, I congratulate you. This is true triumph! Leave the house. Ven. [Reads]-"No contempt can be His rank and honour, ha, ha! He will not severe for the bloated vanity of the s find a gentleman in the whole circuit of the Mother;[He laughs, island to vouch for his character, his property, Coun. Excellent! I like it extremely. B or his title. [As Torrento retires, Spado tot-ed! So, Sir, this is your doing. [Going ters in behind, Drunk, holding up a Letter. Lorenzo]-Bloated vanity! He deserves Spa. A letter, my Lord Count. [The At-racked-bastinadoed. tendants attempt to hold him] Dog, would letter into the fire! you stop royal correspondence? would you rob Lor. Count, hear me; hear reason. W the mail? Is the Prince de Pindemonte here? you be plundered and disgraced? W [Totters about] Keeps mighty good wine in have your family degraded, and your dat his Palazza. I drink his health any time in duped? Read no more of that unfortunate est the twenty-four hours. A letter for the- Ven. I must have a line or two yet. [ĥca Prince de Pindemonté. "Or the inanity of that meagre cr Lor. Spado! [Rushes forward]—That's my pound of title and trade, the-ridiculous letter, Sirrab. ther." [To Lorenzo]-Death and daggers, Tor. Spado! [Seizes the Letter]-That's my Is this all you have to say? What ex** letter. What reason? Out of my house! Inan Coun. Horribly inebriated. We shall come meagre! Out, out! Go! [He tears the Le I'll bring an action! Title and trade! Ther Ven. I wish they were all three looking the impostor. [Pointing to Lorenzo] – {\ for it at the bottom of the deepest well in of the house, I say! Sicily. [Aside. Coun. Out of the house! Prince, let us les Tor. Here, Count and Countess, is convin-him to himself. cing proof! his own letter,-for the fellow can Tor. His whole story is palpably a fe write,-addressed to me! [Reads]-"To his -I think I have peppered the Hussar p Highness the Prince de Pindemonte." bandsomely. Beat him by the odd tra Spa. You the Prince-ha, ha! a prince of last; trumped the Captain's knave. [45 good fellows; always liked him. Worth a [Leading off the Countess towards at the truth at last. 1) Condemned. Door. 1) The soldiers use pipe-clay to clean their regimza Coun. Come, if the Captain want amuse- Col. Let it pass, Major. Forgive the Cornet ment, let him laugh at himself. I can assure his brains; you'll quarrel with no man about him the subject is inexhaustible. trifles. [Exit with Torrento. Maj. Very true, Colonel. But I can't help Ven. [Looking at Lorenzo]—A fine figure wondering what makes the Cornet always so for the picket or the pillory. Meagre inanity hard upon love and the ladies. I should have Title and trade! [Exit Ventoso. thought him the most successful wooer in Lor. Now is my light extinguished! Now the corps. the world [Attempting to pass him. Ste. word Your name? Lor. 'Tis infamous! 'Tis noble blood! blood! Begone! Cor. Ha, ha! You compliment. He civilizes. [Aside] Major, a glass of wine. Col. Conciliatory claret? Major. Maj. No; it's too cold for the occasion. Here, Cornet, a generous bumper of Madeira. My countrymen always go for their healths to Madeira. Cor. And for their morals to Port- Jackson 1), I think they call it. [Aside to the Colonel] But now, Major, be candid. Why did you think me likely to succeed with the sex? Maj. Because the dear creatures are so fond of their own faces, that they always choose a fellow as like themselves as they can. By the glory of the Twentieth! Cor. Diavolo! you shall answer for this. [Rising angrily. Col. Poh! Swallow it with your wine. Lor. [With a bitter laugh]-Mine-noble Here's Lorenzo; he'll laugh at you. Welcome, Captain. We must be on parade beTempt me no further-for this hour, my mind fore the new Viceroy in half an hour. The Is feverish-bitter-thick with sullen thoughts, order, I see, reached you in good time. That touch on madness. That fills your veins. Ste. low me. [Lorenzo rushes out-Stefano gazing ACT V. LORENZO enters. Lor. In the worst time possible, Colonel. I cannot obey it. I would rather throw up my commission. - Victoria is to be married to-night. [Dejectedly. Col. Rapid manoeuvring, that. Marriage in full gallop. Hymen turned into a hussar. Maj. His old rank was in the rifle corps. Ha, ha! SCENE I.-The Mess Room1).-Sabres, Caps, etc. hung up. The COLONEL, MAJOR, and CORNET at Table, after Dinner. Cor. Throw up his commission! Muffs and Cor. The actual Prince de Pindemonté ar- meerschaums! Wear plain clothes, and be Irived, and to be proclaimed Viceroy to night! taken for a doctor or a lawyer, or some such We shall be broke, every soul of us; - ex-abomination. The man's crazed.-Try if he'll coriated of fur, lace and feather, for life; ut-stand a glass of water. [Aside to Major. terly nonentified! Muffs and meerschaums. Maj. No; water proves nothing in the corps. Col. This arrival is certainly most unex- All hussars have the hydrophobia 2) by nature. pected and unlucky. Is there any thing of Lor. Those people about Victoria make a the Prince in the evening paper, Major? bugbear of me. It is to prevent presumed Maj. [Glancing over it]-Heads of columns, disturbance from me, that this unfortunate paragraphs, rank and file. [Reads] "Mar- ceremony is thus hurried; and is to take place riage in high life-Grand boxing match: Fa- in an old castle a league out of town. shionable boarding school-Capital man-traps: Col. And are we to buy or blow up your The comet -- New tale of the Isle of Sky: castle? Polar passage: voyage to the moon." IIa, ha! Lor. None of the family have ever visited not a syllable, Colonel. it. It was left to the old Count to dispose of Col. One of the aides-de-camp has just taken in somne way or other. Their ignorance seemed the order for parade to Lorenzo's quarters. to allow me a chance of rescuing Victoria This love is a formidable thing, when it keeps from ruin. Spado has already ordered our a man from messing. The lady's picture is grooms to drive their Prince, and be hanged certainly striking. to him, and his cavalcade, round the suburbs, Maj. She's a beauty of the first water. She and, under cover of night, lodge them in the should lodge in my heart on a lease for ever, jail instead of their castle. I shall then burst and as long as she liked after. upon them, and break up the imposture at Col. Lodge in your heart, Major? Aye, and in your head! - love reigns a tyrant, if he reigns at all. Cor. In the Major's head! Muffs and meerschaums, would you put the lady into unfurnished lodgings? 1) Dining Room.. 1) A hit at the Irish gentlemen, who take refuge in this Island to avoid their creditors; the Major only hears the word Port (wine), the Irish being a wine-drinking nation are influenced to good deeds by drinking Port; Jackson, as heard by the Colonel, finishes the stroke; Port Jackson is in Botany bay, and thus the wit of this phrase is perfectly clear. 2) An aversion to water. once, by flinging the impostor into his dungeon But now away with you, every man to his before their eyes. - [Spado enters.]—And cell.-What! grumbling? Why, you dogs, here's Spado. What have you done? Have you ought to think yourselves the luckiest you settled their reception with the jailor. fellows alive to be here. Are the grooms prepared? Are the cavalcade [To Spado. going? Spa. Signior, the cavalcade are gone. I saw them off: a grand show, Sir, private as it was! The old Count and Countess full of bustleblunders and Brussels lace, according to custom; the bride full of blushes and tears, according to custom; and the bride's maids, servant maids, and maids of all descriptions, full of laughing and impudence, tattle and white topI will be knots, also according to custom. revenged on some of them, yet. Lor. Silence, Sir!-will you be kicked out of the room? can Song.-JAILOR and Chorus. From Monday to Monday morning. When once he's here, At the world he may jeer, And Till he takes his swing, All on a Monday morning. Cor. According to custom. [Spado goes. Col. Yet, Lorenzo, if the affair be so close all with you. Jail. Off with you, here comes the party upon beginning, we go We have still half an hour before parade. Away, you hounds! [Exeunt Lazaro as Lor. My dear Colonel, I must insist on Prisoners.] — Here they live without rent going alone. I know the result of having tithe, or taxes, and do as little for it as if they used the Viceroy's name; and no man shall were many lords; and yet they wỀ be implicated in my misfortunes. On this hour grumble! may depend every future moment of my life. I must go, were I never to return. [Exit. [Major, Colonel, and Cornet, SO [En [A Door is unlocked, and the Count Countess, and Torrento, highly dressed, come in. Tor. Upon my honour, Count, this is the And what 1 Maj. [Calls]-Wait a moment. Off like a most singular looking castle. rocket. You shan't go alone, unless you take detestable atmosphere of rank tobacco, at us along with you; that's plain. [Exit. vinegar wine! Your friend must have lived Col. That's plain; yes, plain Irish, Major.—like a bashaw or a bandit, and this was the Forwards! [Exit, laughing. black hole. Ven. The Marquis was a singular mas Cor. [Equipping himself]-Detestable, to be hurried in one's making up 1). Irish!-certainly. Very gloomy, very ancient; a very The Major's blunders spring up as thick as ghostly habitation. blossoms in one of his own potatoe fields. Coun. Husband, husband, its a very fine Perdition to all straps, strings, and stay-laces, castle; our reception was quite royal, senI say. [Trying to put on his Accoutre-tinels on the walls, lighted torches, draw ments.] Chin-stays and chokebands! Dia-bridges up, altogether a very grand affair. volo! Sebastian, my sal volatile. [He calls]— Tor. [Aside]-It has the look of a jal My tailor has been taking measure of some the smell of a jail-it feels like a jail. [To Ven one for the half pay 2) — no allowance for Why have you brought me to this detestable dinner. Viva! there's a form. The Major was place? A wedding in this-condemned cell Ven. Excellent name!-very appropriate for right. Irresistible! "C'est l'amour, l'amour, l'amour." [Exit, singing. the ceremony-chains for life. Ha, ha, ha! Tor. Chains for life-capital jest-ha, ha. SCENE II.—A Hall in the Jail, with a rude ha! [He forces a Laugh, which gradually attempt at decoration on the Walls. A diminishes.] A prodigious smell of thieves Wreath of tarnished Flowers, festooning and this is, I [Aside a grated Window. Prisoners are busy Coun. Prince, this is but the reception room: removing Chains and Bolts. Some are I orderered the grand baronial hall to be sitting at a small Table, drinking. The prepared for the ceremony. JAILOR comes in hastily, with LAZARO. suppose, the door. [Tries it.] Bless me, Jail. Hurry, hurry! Off with yourselves is lock'd. Tor, [Runs over to it] Lock'd, aye, and and your table. By St. Januarius, this looks showy, gay, quite in the gala style, Lazaro. double lock d. [Aside. Angrily to Ventosa I wish we had the floor chalked 3);- -we might For what purpose is this locking up, Sir have a quadrille — Ha, ha, ha! [4 Noise of And at this early hour too; it's against all rule. Chains outside.]-Hurry, hurry! We are to Ven. Your Highness! this can be nothing have grand visitors to-night. Rather an odd but the carefulness of the servants. My friend, place for a wedding, to be sure. What would the Marquis, was a very particular man, and you say to being one of the brides-maids, La-locked up every thing, himself included. He zaro-ha, ha, ha! [The Prisoners laugh.] was a great buyer of all sorts of oddities, curiosities, and monstrosities. He built this like a castle for a show, and then shut it up prison. You have heard of the Marquis Chiar Oscuro? Tor. The Marquis! unquestionably-my most particular friend. Ha, ha! that explains for the whole matter, and this was the castle-fire by friction, she would be a volcano. I heard of his sale at the Antipodes. He had Maj. Every one to his taste; but if the a wing of the original Phoenix-Pope Joan's daughter be like the mamma, I would as soon marriage articles-Queen Elizabeth's wedding marry a mermaid.-Where can Lorenzo be?ring-a wig of Dido of Carthage-and a pair I will go for him-They'll be off. of pantaloons made for Don Bellianis of Greece. Col. Gathering nerve on the terrace [They laugh] But the ladiessooth-they'll escape-stay, Cornet. Cor. Stay in this den and be devoured 1)?— 'Pon honour-No. [They go out. Coun. The coxcombs! - Open the door, I [Calling. Ven. Aye, where are the ladies? always late, always lingering. Coun. I have left them in another apartment till the arrival of the priest. There must be no hurry, no precipitation. Marriage is a serious thing. say. Ven. Yes, your Highness; it is as little of a joke as any thing in the world. But let us begin. One is not the more reconciled to the dose, by looking at it. [Aside] I will run after the ladies. [He hurries out. Leon. Torrento! Is it possible? [In surprise. Tor. And a very gallant run for your age.— Tor. Leonora, by what wonder has this But now, my charming Countess, for on my happened? I am delighted beyond expression. honour, with that bloom on your cheek, and I have a thousand questions to ask. Count that brilliancy in your eyes, I can't bring my- and Countess, excuse me a moment. self to call you -Mother-in-law. Now- Leon. And is this a time to ask? I am [Voices of the Hussars without. overwhelmed with surprise, with sorrow, with Hussars. Ha, ha, ha!-By the glory of the shame. I thought that you had fled from Twentieth-excellent, down with bar, bolt, and Palermo. I lived only in the hope of your chain-Muffs and meerschaums-Allspice and return. But to find you here, my sister's sugar canes- [The Hussars burst in. bridegroom-you the Prince!-Traitor, I will Maj. Bravo! just in time; the turtle's under unmask you. the net.Colonel, let's have a laugh at the Tor. Hush! one word. I will satisfy all Cornet. [Aside]-Cornet, may I have the honour of introducing you to-the Bride. Coun. The whole barrack broke loose, as I'm an honest woman!-[To Torrento] Bride! what do the monsters mean? your doubts; I expected to meet you; I have been as much deceived as yourself. I'll marry none but you. I swear, by the brightness of your eyes, by every star Leon. Ah! yours, I fear, are wandering Tor. The Hussars! found out and followed. stars. [He leads her up the Stage. --Bride-the old Countess-Ha, ha! [Aside]- Coun. A mighty handsome reception, inDon't mind their insolence. Those gentlemen deed! The Prince's affability is charming. are court jesters, paid for making themselves 'Tis all the way in high life. Friendships are ridiculous; and by all that's absurd, they earn as quickly made there astheir money. Away, Lady.. [They approach the Door. Cor. [Surveying her with his Glass] The Bride! a very antique susceptibility-a grand climacteric, touched by the heavenly passion. Col. It must have been something heavenly; for nothing earthly could have done it. Maj. Yes; like an old tree, set on fire by lightning. Ven. They are unmade. He's prodigiously affable. Why, it's absolute love-making. [Calls] Your Highness, the bride is coming. By St. Agnes, he forgets her, as much as if they had been married a month. LORENZO enters from an opposite Door. VICTORIA, attended by Bridemaids, enters. [Irresolutely. Lor. Victoria! [She is overwhelmed. [To the Count] There's a dimness on my eyes! Save me, my father. I would rather look Upon the pale and hollow front of death, Than meet that glance. Cor. [Still approaching]- Victim of Cupid-Maiden innocence-Virgin virago! [Aside, to the Hussars. Coun. [Bursting away from Torrento, and following the Cornet]-Why, you red mountebank!-you impudent man-milliner!you thing of mummery and moustaches-you King's bad bargain-you apology for a man-There lies the door. Begone! you trooper All. Trooper!" Lor. [Advancing] Victoria! if your heartCoun. Stand back, plebeian! Marry with your like. Ven. [Calling to Torrento]-Prince! take your bride. Maj. It's the old lady herself! Countess Those wives and daughters! Figs and Raisins, by the glory of the Twentieth! [Aside. Lor. Scorn'd, aspers'd, disdain'd, For blood, that flows as hotly in my veins Col. Let me see her with the naked eye. As in an emperor's, Ginger and Cayenne to the life! Can birth bequeath Cor. The venerable charmer that insulted Mind to the mindless; spirit to the vile; the whole regiment. The old horse - marine! Valour to dastards; virtue to the knave?Bless me, how she prances! Why don't you 'Tis nobler to stand forth the architect stop her-Colonel-MajorOf our own fame, than lodge i' the dusty halls Of ancestry!-To shine before the world, Like sunrise from the dusk, than twinkle on 1) By little animals. Maj. I would as soon stop a chain-shot. |