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“ Trim,” said my uncle Toby, “I "everything straightforwards as I learned have a project in my head, as it is a bad it.” “Then, Trim, I'll fill another pipe, night, of wrapping myself up warm in my said my uncle Toby, “and not interrupt roquelaure, and paying a visit to this poor thee till thou hast done ; so sit down at gentleman.” " Your honour's roque- thy ease, Trim, in the window-seat, and laure," replied the corporal, “has not begin thy story again.” The corporal once been had on since the night before made his old bow, which generally your honour received your wound, when spoke as plain as a bow could speak we mounted guard in the trenches before it-Your honour is good. And having the gate of St. Nicholas. And besides, done that, he sat down, as he was it is so cold and rainy a night, that what ordered ; and begun the story to my with the roquelaure, and what with the uncle Toby over again in pretty near the weather, 'twill be enough to give your same words. honour your death, and bring on your “I despaired at first,” said the corhonour's torment in your groin.” “I poral, “ of being able to bring back any fear so," replied my uncle Toby; "but intelligence to your honour about the I am not at rest in my mind, Trim, since lieutenant and his son; for when I asked the account the landlord has given me. where his servant was, from whom I made I wish I had not known so much of this myself sure of knowing everything which affair,” added my uncle Toby, or that was proper to be asked”-“ That's a I had known more of it. How shall we right distinction, Trim,” said my uncle manage it?”
“Leave it, an't please your Toby)—“I was answered, an' please honour, to me,” quoth the corporal. your honour, that he had no servant "I'll take my hat and stick, and go to with him ; that he had come to the inn the house and reconnoitre, and act accord- with hired horses, which, upon finding ingly; and I will bring your honour a himself unable to proceed-to join, I sup full account in an hour." “Thou shalt pose, the regiment—he had dismissed the go, Trim,” said my uncle Toby; "and morning after he came. • If I get better, here's a shilling for thee to drink with his my dear,' he said, as he gave
purse servant. “I shall get it all out of his son to pay the man, we can hire him,” said the corporal, shutting the horses from hence.' ‘But, alas! the door.
poor gentleman will never get from My uncle Toby filled his second pipe ; hence, said the landlady to me; 'for I and had it not been that he now and heard the death-watch all night long : then wandered from the point, with con- and when he dies, the youth his son will sidering whether it was not full as well to certainly die with him; for he is brokenhave the curtain of the tenaille a straight hearted already.' line as a crooked one, he might be said "I was hearing this account,” conto have thought of nothing else but poor tinued the corporal, “when the youth Le Fevre and his boy the whole time he came into the kitchen, to order the thin smoked it.
toast the landlord spoke of. “But I will It was not till my uncle Toby had do it for my father myself,' said the knocked the ashes out of his third pipe, youth. 'Pray let me save you the trouble, that corporal Trim returned from the inn, young gentleman,' said I, taking up a and gave him the following account :- fork for the purpose, and offering him “I despaired at first,” said the corporal, my chair to sit down upon by the fire “of being able to bring back your honour whilst I did it. 'I believe, sir,' said he, any kind of intelligence concerning the very modestly, 'I can poor sick lieutenant." “Is he in the myself.' 'I am sure,
said I, 'his army, then?” said my uncle Toby. “ He honour will not like the toast the worse is,” said the corporal. “ And in what for being toasted by an old soldier.' The regiment ?" said my uncle Toby. “I'll youth took hold of my hand, and instantly tell your honour,” replied the corporal, burst into tears. “ Poor youth,” said
please him best
my uncle Toby; "he has been bred up from an infant in the army, and the name of a soldier, Trim, sounded in his ears like the name of a friend; I wish I had him here."
"I never in the longest march," said the corporal, "had so great a mind to my dinner, as I had to cry with him for company. What could be the matter with me, an' please your honour?" "Nothing in the world, Trim," said my uncle Toby, blowing his nose, "but that thou art a good-natured fellow."
"When I gave him the toast, continued the corporal, "I thought it was proper to tell him I was Captain Shandy's servant, and that your honour, though a stranger, was extremely concerned for his father; and that, if there was anything in your house or cellar"-("And thou mightst have added my purse too," said my uncle Toby)-"he was heartily welcome to it. He made a very low bow, which was meant to your honour; but no answer, for his heart was full; so he went up stairs with the toast. 'I warrant you, my dear,' said I, as I opened the kitchen door, 'your father will be well again.' Mr. Yorick's curate was smoking a pipe by the kitchen fire, but said not a word good or bad, to comfort the youth. I thought it wrong," added the corporal. "I think so too," said my uncle Toby.
"When the lieutenant had taken his glass of sack and toast, he felt himself a little revived, and sent down into the kitchen to let me know that in about ten minutes he should be glad if I would step upstairs. I believe,' said the landlord, he is going to say his prayers, for there was a book laid upon the chair by his bedside, and as I shut the door, I saw his son take up a cushion.'
"I thought,' said the curate, 'that you gentlemen of the army, Mr. Trim, never said your prayers at all.' 'I heard the poor gentleman say his prayers last night,' said the landlady, 'very devoutly, and with my own ears, or I could not have believed it.' 'Are you sure of it?' replied the curate. "A soldier, an' please your reverence,' said I, 'prays as often of his own accord as a parson; and
when he is fighting for his king, and for his own life, and for his honour too, he has the most reason to pray to God of any one in the whole world." "" 'Twas well said of thee, Trim," said my uncle Toby. But when a soldier,' said I, an' please your reverence, has been standing for twelve hours together in the trenches up to his knees in cold water, or engaged,' said I, 'for months together, in long and dangerous marches harassed, perhaps, in his rear to-day harassing others to-morrow; detached here; countermanded there; resting this night out upon his arms; beat up in his shirt the next; benumbed in his joints; perhaps without straw in his tent to kneel on; one must say his prayers how and when he can. I believe,' said I—" for I was piqued," quoth the corporal, "for the reputation of the army "I believe, an' please your reverence,' said I, 'that when a soldier gets time to pray, he prays as heartily as a parson, though not with all his fuss and hypocrisy."" "Thou shouldst not have said that, Trim," said my uncle Toby; "for God only knows who is a hypocrite and who is not. At the great and general review of us all, corporal, at the day of judgment, and not till then, it will be seen who has done their duties in this world, and who has not; and we shall be advanced, Trim, accordingly." "I hope we shall," said Trim. "It is in the Scripture," said my uncle Toby; "and I will show it thee to-morrow. In the meantime, we may depend upon it, Trim, for our comfort," said my uncle Toby, "that God Almighty is so good and just a governor of the world, that if we have but done our duties in it, it will never be inquired into whether we have done them in a red coat or a black one. "I hope not," said the corporal. But go on, Trim," said my uncle Toby, "with thy story."
"When I went up," continued the corporal, "into the lieutenant's room, which I did not do till the expiration of the ten minutes, he was lying in his bed with his head raised upon his hand, with his elbow upon the pillow, and a clean white cambric handkerchief beside it.
The youth was just stooping down to take up the cushion, upon which I supposed he had been kneeling; the book was laid upon the bed; and as he rose, in taking up the cushion with one hand, he reached out his other to take it away at the same time. Let it remain there, my dear,' said the lieutenant.
"He did not offer to speak to me till I had walked up close to his bedside. 'If you are Captain Shandy's servant,' said he, 'you must present my thanks to your master, with my little boy's thanks along with them, for his courtesy to me.' If he was of Levens's, said the lieutenant. I told him your honour was. 'Then,' said he, 'I served three campaigns with him in Flanders, and remember him; but 'tis most likely, as I had not the honour of any acquaintance with him, that he knows nothing of me. You will tell him, however, that the person his good nature has laid under obligations to him, is one Le Fevre, a lieutenant in Angus's. But he knows me not,' said he, a second time, musing. Possibly he may my story,' added he. 'Pray, tell the captain, I was the ensign at Breda whose wife was most unfortunately killed with a musket-shot as she lay in my arms in my tent.' 'I remember the story, an 't please your honour,' said I, 'very well. 'Do you so?' said he, wiping his eyes with his handkerchief; 'then well may I.' In saying this, he drew a little ring out of his bosom, which seemed tied with a black ribbon about his neck, and kissed it twice. Here, Billy,' said he. The boy flew across the room to the bedside, and falling down upon his knee, took the ring in his hand, and kissed it too; then kissed his father, and sat down upon the bed and wept."
"I wish," said my uncle Toby, with a deep sigh-"I wish I was asleep. "Your honour," replied the corporal," "is too much concerned. Shall I pour your honour out a glass of sack to your pipe?" "Do, Trim," said my uncle Toby.
"I remember," said my uncle Toby, sighing again, "the story of the ensign and his wife, with a circumstance his modesty omitted; and particularly well
that he, as well as she, upon some account or other, I forget what, was universally pitied by the whole regiment; but finish the story thou art upon.' """Tis finished already," said the corporal, “for I could stay no longer; so wished his honour a good night. Young Le Fevre rose from off the bed, and saw me to the bottom of the stairs; and as we went down together, told me they had come from Ireland, and were on their route to join the regiment in Flanders. But, alas!" said the corporal, "the lieutenant's last day's march is over." "Then what is to become of this poor boy?” cried my uncle Toby.
It was to my uncle Toby's eternal honour-though I tell it only for the sake of those who, when cooped in betwixt a natural and a positive law, know not for their souls which way in the world to turn themselves-that, notwithstanding my uncle Toby was warmly engaged at that time in carrying on the siege of Dendermond, parallel with the allies, who pressed theirs on so vigorously that they scarce allowed him time to get his dinner-that nevertheless he gave up Dendermond, though he had already made a lodgment upon the counterscarp and bent his whole thoughts towards his private distresses at the inn; and except that he ordered the garden gate to be bolted up, by which he might be said to have turned the siege of Dendermond into a blockade, he left Dendermond to itself, to be relieved or not by the French king as the French king thought good, and only considered how he himself should relieve the poor lieutenant and his son. That kind Being, who is a friend to the friendless, shall recompense thee for this.
"Thou hast left this matter short," said my uncle Toby to the corporal, as he was putting him to bed; "and I will tell thee in what, Trim. In the first place, when thou mad'st an offer of my services to Le Fevre-as sickness and travelling are both expensive, and thou knowest he was but a poor lieutenant, with a son to subsist as well as himself out of his paythat thou didst not make an offer to him
of my purse ; because, had he stood in The sun looked bright the morning need, thou knowest, Trim, he had been after to every eye in the village but Le as welcome to it as myself.” “Your Fevre's and his afflicted son's. The hand honour knows,” said the corporal, “ I had of death pressed heavy upon his eyelids, no orders.”
* True,” quoth my uncle and hardly could the wheel at the cistern Toby; "thou didst very right, Trim, as a turn round its circle, when myuncle Toby, soldier, but certainly very wrong as a who had rose up an hour before his wonted
time, entered the lieutenant's room, and “In the second place, for which, indeed, without preface or apology, sat himself thou hast the same excuse, ,”? continued down upon the chair by the bedside ; and my uncle Toby, “when thou offeredst independently of all modes and customs, him whatever was in my house, thou opened the curtain in the manner an old shouldst have offered him my house too. friend and brother-officer would have A sick brother-officer should have the best done it, and asked him how he did-how quarters, Trim ; and if we had him with he had rested in the night-what was his us, we could tend and look to him. Thou complaint-where was his pain-and what art an excellent nurse thyself, Trim ; and he could do to help him. And without what with the care of him, and the old giving him time to answer any one of the woman's and his boy's, and mine together, inquiries, went on and told him of the we might recruit him again at once, and little plan which he had been concerting set him upon his legs. In a fortnight or with the corporal the night before for him. three weeks,” added my uncle Toby, “You shall go home directly,” Le Fevre, smiling, "he might march.” “He will said my uncle Toby, “to my house, and never march, an' please your honour, in we'll send for a doctor to see what's the this world,” said the corporal. “He will matter; and we'll have an apothecary, march,” said my uncle Toby, rising up and the corporal shall be your nurse, and from the side of the bed with one shoe I'll be your servant, Le Fevre.” off. “An please your honour,” said the There was a frankness in my uncle corporal, he will never march, but to Toby-not the effect of familiarity, but his grave.” “He shall march,” cried the cause of it--which let you at once into my uncle Toby, marching the foot which his soul, and showed you the goodness of had a shoe on, though without advancing nature ; to this there was something in his an inch—," he shall march to his regi- looks, and voice, and manner superadded, ment.” "He cannot stand it,” said the which eternally beckoned to the unfortucorporal. “He shall be supported,” said nate to come and take shelter under him; my uncle Toby. “He'll drop at last,” so that before my uncle Toby had half said the corporal ; and what will become finished the kind offers he was making to of his boy?" “He shall not drop,” said the father, had the son insensibly pressed my uncle Toby firmly. “A-well-o'-day, up close to his knees, and had taken hold do what we can for him," said Trim, of the breast of his coat, and was pulling maintaining his point, “the poor soul it towards him. The blood and spirits of will die.” “He shall not die, by G-" Le Fevre, which were waxing cold and cried my uncle Toby. The Accusing slow within him, and were retreating to Spirit, which flew up to heaven's chancery their last citadel, the heart rallied back; with the oath, blushed as he gave it in, the film forsook his eyes for a moment; and the Recording Angel, as he wrote it he looked up wishfully in my uncle Toby's down, dropped a tear upon the word, and face, then cast a look upon his boy ; and blotted it out for ever.
that ligament, fine as it was, was never My uncle Toby went to his bureau ; put broken. Nature instantly ebbed again ; his purse into his breeches' pocket; and the film returned to its place; the pulse having ordered the corporal to go early in Auttered-stopped-wenton—throbbed the morning for a physician, he went to-stopped again-moved-stopped. Shall bed and fell asleep.
I go on? No.- Tristram Shandy.
on one side-she was beautiful ; and if MARIA.
ever I felt the full force of an honest heart-ache, it was the moment I saw
her. God help her! poor damsel ! They were the sweetest notes I ever Above a hundred masses, said the postilheard, and I instantly let down the fore- lion, have been said in the several glass to hear them more distinctly. 'Tis parish churches and convents around, Maria, said the postillion, observing I was for her—but without effect. We have listening. Poor Maria, continued he still hopes, as she is still sensible for (leaning his body on one side to let me short intervals, that the Virgin at last see her, for she was in a line betwixt us), will restore her to herself; but her is sitting upon a bank playing her vespers parents, who know her best, are hopeless upon her pipe with her little goat beside upon that score, and think her senses are her. The young fellow uttered this with lost for ever. As the postillion spoke an accent and a look so perfectly in tune this, Maria made a cadence so melanto a feeling heart, that I instantly made choly, so tender and querulous, that I a vow, I would give him a four-and- sprang out of the chaise to help her, and twenty sous piece, when I got to Mou- found myself sitting, betwixt" her and lines. -And who is poor Maria ? said her goat before I relapsed from my enI. The love and pity of all the villages thusiasm. Maria looked wishfully for around us, said the postillion : it is but some time at me, and then at her goatthree years ago, that the sun did not and then at me, and then at her goat shine upon so fair, so quick-witted, and again, and so on, alternately.- -Well, amiable a maid ; and better fate did Maria, said I, softly, What resemblance Maria deserve, than to have her banns do you find ? I do intreat the candid forbid, by the intrigues of the curate of reader to believe me, that it was from the parish who published them. He the humblest conviction of what a beast was going on, when Maria, who had man is, that I asked the question ; and made a short pause, put the pipe to her that I would not have let fallen an unmouth and began the air again : they seasonable pleasantry in the venerable were the same notes ;-yet were ten presence of Misery, to be entitled to all times sweeter. It is the evening service the wit that even Rabelais scattered. to the Virgin, said the young man ; but Adieu, Maria ! — adieu, poor hapless who has taught her to play it, or how damsel !—some time, but not now,
I she came by her pipe, no one knows; may hear thy sorrows from thy own lips we think that Heaven has assisted her in - but I was deceived ; for that moment both; for ever since she has been un- she took her pipe and told me such a tale settled in her mind, it seems her only of woe with it, that I rose up, and with consolation-she has never once had the broken and irregular steps walked softly pipe out of her hand, but plays that to my chaise. service upon it almost night and day. The postillion delivered this with so
SECOND PART. much discretion and natural eloquence, WHEN we had got within half a league that I could not help deciphering some- of Moulines, at a little opening in the thing in his face above his condition, and road leading to a thicket, I discovered should have sifted out his history, had poor Maria, sitting under a poplar. She not poor Maria's taken such full posses- was sitting with her elbow in her lap, sion of me.
We had got up by this and her head leaning on one side, within time almost to the bank where Maria her hand : a small brook ran at the foot was sitting ; she was in a thin white of the tree. I bade the postillion go on jacket, with her hair, all but two tresses, with the chaise to Moulines, and La drawn up into a silk net, with a few Sleur to bespeak my supper, and that I olive leaves twisted a little fantastically would walk after him. She was dressed