and that bleffed Spirit having condefcended to make use of you, Sir, in furthering this gracious. manifestation in my foul, I hope that my addreffing these particulars to you will tend ftill further to encourage you in the miniftry which you have received of the Lord Jefus; the efficacy of whofe promised bleffing (Matt. xxviii. 20) is to this day verified in every foul that is quickened by his word, and to whom his gofpel is made the wisdom of God, and the power of God, to falvation. Thus thofe who are fent of God to preach, and those to whom their preaching is made profitable, may rejoice in the behalf of each other, as well as of themselves; and, together with all his church, the spiritual Zion, will have abundant caufe to blefs him for his faithfulness and truth to his covenant promifes and engagements, and for his loving-kindness and tender mercies, difplayed in the falvation of finners freely by grace in Chrift Jefus our Lord and only Saviour.

Were I to attempt to defcribe all that has paffed within me, both before and fince it pleased the bleffed Spirit to give me an experience of his quickening power, it would only be taking up your time in endeavouring to do that which you have often done for me with ten times greater exactness than I could do it with myself; and which, while it proves you to be a scribe well inftructed in the kingdom of heaven, has also been bleffed

to my encouragement, feeing I was thus led in the footsteps of the flock. Suffice it therefore to fay, that I had been in a profeffion of religion for upwards of ten years before I knew any thing of what true religion was, but it was altogether a fleshly profeffion; for on leaving my friends in the country, by whom I had been brought up in a very regular manner, and coming to London, where already I had a brother, my defires fo yearned after my relatives (than whom I believe none were ever more affectionate), that I gladly took every opportunity of being with him; and as he, with a companion of his, were earnestly feeking the way of falvation (and have not fought in vain), I readily affociated with, and accompanied them to places of public worship, and I foon began to entertain a fuperftitious reverence for thofe places, often walking bare-headed by them, efpecially the place where I received the facrament of bread and wine. The doctrine of falvation by Jefus Chrift, as a mediator, when firft unfolded to my natural understanding, charme J me as a novelty; as fuch I adopted it into my opinions, and this paffed with me for converfion. I attended the preaching of those who mingled the law with the letter of the gofpel, and this often ftirred up my legal conscience against me; then my aim was to appease it; and when confcience was quieted, either by the fenfe of guilt wearing off, or by performing dead

works, or by any other means (no matter how), I was fatisfied. I attended prayer and experience meetings, but never knew what it was to have access to God in prayer, nor ever expected any anfwer to my petitions, further than hoping all would be well at laft. I could talk fluently on the doctrines of the gospel, and this served to nurfe my pride. Nay, I remember I once went fo far at one of thefe meetings as to fay that I could as foon be brought to believe that there was no Holy Ghoft, as that I had not found him prefent with me, when, alas! I knew nothing of that bleffed Spirit's quickening influence; nothing of the power of the kingdom of heaven; nothing of the covenant of grace, nor of the love of God in Chrift Jefus. I was bolftered in felfconfidence, daubed with untempered mortar, and vainly puffed up in my fleshly mind. After fome years I heard Mr. Romaine preach, and then you, and fat under both for fome time; but, though I had light enough to fee that this preaching was different from what I had before attended, and believed it to be the truth, yet, as the excellency of the power is all of God, and not of man, I ftill remained a whole-hearted finner. Thus I went on for years, confcience at times ftill reproving me; but, as I had only jumped into a profeffion at first in the bonds of natural affection, and as the charms of novelty had worn off, at length thefe bonds became

weaker and weaker, I began to grow more remifs, religion, became wearifome to me, and then, for want of root, my profeffion withered; as I had received no benefit from it, it could not hold me. I returned into the world and its pleafures again, and became as a tree twice dead, plucked up by the roots. Yet, as confcience would never be entirely quiet, I fometimes used to come to the chapel when the fermon was more than half over, and then crept in behind, ashamed to fhew my face; nor could I altogether leave off prayer, or at leaft attempting to pray; and there is one thought that would fometimes strike my mind, even in this dead feafon, which I have fince confidered as an indication that God had not altogether given me up to a reprobate mind; it was, that if my brother, or any other perfon whom I really believed to be a child of God, fhould backflide, or leave his ways and worship, it would have grieved me to the very heart to fee it, both for his own fake, and for the honour and caufe of God. In this dreary ftate I continued for, I believe, more than five years, and never knew what real peace was all the time. Added to this, my backfliding would cause all religion to ftink in the noftrils of those who knew not God, and had feen my former high profeffion, for a backflider I was, and ftill confider myself to have been, from the light and knowledge I had, although there was nothing of

a faving nature in it. I do not mean to say that my profeffion has been of no fervice at all, for I believe it has fince pleased the bleffed Spirit of God fo far to make use of it, as to fhew me, experimentally, the difference between a form of godliness and the power thereof, and, by the contrast, to make his own work more manifeft. Alfo, having learnt that falvation was only in Chrift, I did not, when afterwards seeking it earneftly, fly to the letter of commandments to earn life by my own endeavours to keep them, though I have found that this sort of knowledge never deftroyed the dominion of fin, nor that legal spirit that was within me, and for which I have often had occafion to loathe myfelf, as well as for my finful nature. But herein appears the long-fuffering of God in preferving me through this state of ignorance and fin to a future calling; and I have often thought it was (if I may use the expreffion) a double ftretch of his great power to refcue me from the ftrong bands of fin and Satan, fince it is declared that fuch as were in my cafe were further from the kingdom of heaven than publicans and harlots.

About four or five years ago it pleased the Lord to lay the guilt of fin upon my confcience as a burden too heavy for me to bear, fo that I earnestly defired to flee from the wrath to come; at other times I felt my spirit drawn out in fecret defires and breathings after God: and this bur