29. Ye see how large a letter I have written unto you with mine own hand, and, moreover, in virtue of the plenitude of my supremacy, I grant an indulgence of four hundred years, nine months, eleven days, three hours, and seven minutes, and three quarters, to every one who shall read it at a sitting, and repeat ten Hail Marys, and seventeen Paternosters.

30. Salute my great toe with an holy kiss.

31. Grace and peace be with all that count their beads, and frequent masses, and pray to Mary, and purchase indulgences, on them the fire of purgatory hath no power, and their sins, though they be as scarlet, shall in no wise be remembered against them, neither in this world, neither in the world to come.

Given at our pontifical palace at Rome (opposite Simon the tanner's), sub ann. Pisc., in the forty-seventh year of grace, and fourteenth of our pontificate.

L. S. A true copy.

PAUL PINGUEBELLI,

Cardinal of Ganderopolis.

Popery, my friends, is, in my judgment, neither more nor less than a gorgeous and grotesque caricature of Christianity. Many ingenious humorists in modern times, after selecting some of the most sublime and renowned pictures of the ancient masters, have acquired distinction for themselves, and furnished recreation for their readers, by closely and curiously adapting them to the principal events and eminent politicians of our own era. On the same principle, the Pope" may be said to have tortured and travestied the leading facts and features of the gospel, for consolidating his own despotism, and authorizing his own usurpations, interlarding, however, so many strange and anomalous interpolations, that the faint resemblance is almost buried in a mass of unseemly and monstrous incongruities. There is not a - more palpable contrast between the epistles of Peter and that of Boniface (as here attempted to be portrayed), than between the doctrines and ordinances of the gospel,

I

and the figments, and fopperies, and fooleries, which "Christ's vicar" (wherever his baneful authority extends) has audaciously substituted in their stead. might have still further illustrated what Christianity would have been, had Popish rites and tenets prevailed in the church's infancy, by laying before you not only a few more epistles similar to that of Boniface, but a book of "the Acts of the Mother of God, and of the Saints," exclusively dug out of the inexhaustible dross of Popish lies and legends. But I trust, that this specimen may more than suffice to render you, if possible, more thankful than ever for the Holy Scriptures, which have been written not only for our learning, and for our guidance (under the Spirit's teaching) into all truth, but to serve as a celestial talisman against the fascinating plausibilities of error, the fantastic mummeries of will-worship, and the gloomy thraldom of superstition.

On the absurdity and extravagance of the legends, concocted and credited in the Popish Church, it is unnecessary for me to dwell at any length. But you may perhaps peruse with some interest a specimen of these marvellous tales, connected with the miracle narrated in a former letter, according to which, the Cardinal Lobster, who was one of the admiring audience at St Antony's sermon addressed to the fish, presides, under the title of St Peter ad hamum, as legate a latere, over an extensive diocese at the bottom of the ocean.

A miracle takes place annually in his Eminence's submarine cathedral, to which the yearly liquefaction of the blood of St Januarius at Naples bears a strong and striking resemblance. On the festival of St Granchio, a large crystal vat, about sixty feet in circumference and ten in depth, presented and blessed by Pope Alexander the Eighth, is placed before the high altar. After mass has been celebrated by the cardinal archbishop, the senior canon (who is always a member of the dolphin family) removes from a superb cover of crimson velvet a silver urn of exquisite workmanship, hermetically

sealed, and filled with rich gelatine. As soon as the prior of the convent of red mullets has censed the vessel for about eight minutes, and has pronounced six Ave Marias, he breaks the seal, and removes the cover, when the canon pours the contents into the crystal vat, where they immediately assume the figure of a very large and lively John d'Ory, which swims up and down to the delight of the devout spectators, who instantly prostrate themselves on their knees, and repeat eleven Paternosters. The chief provincial of the college of sturgeons then throws a bajocco of the reigning Pope into the water, which the fish swallows with avidity; and the cardinal lowers the sacred hook into the vat, without any bait. The hook is instantly laid hold of by the John d'Ory, which the cardinal drags in triumph to the altar. On opening its mouth, his eminence removes the piece of money, which has been converted from a copper coin of last year into a silver denarius of Caracalla. The fish is then held up over the silver urn by the tail, and on being touched with a large rosary made of oyster shells, gradually drops into it in the form of gelatine, after which it is carefully sealed up and laid by until the ensuing year.

The bones of the 153 fish, which Simon Peter drew to land after the resurrection, constitute another relic of great interest and value. Of these, 117 are preserved in the submarine cathedral, which has just been described-13 in a convent of female turbots at the bottom of the Gulf of Florida-11 in a monastery of red mullets in the Sea of Marmora—and 12 in a priory of grey mullets, about fifty leagues distant from the western coast of the Mediterranean; besides which, the entire set is shown at a nunnery of congor eels, which was founded in the Pentland Firth by St Anguilla, in the reign of King James III. (1477.)-(See bull of Sixtus IV., dated 11th August in that year.) The discovery of these precious relics took place, (according to St Acipenser de Eccles. submar., vol. iii. p. 171. Strasb. ed. 1691) in the year 1135, when St Muræna and St

Rhomba, the daughters of two illustrious families of the finny tribe, who lived in habits of sisterly affection, both dreamt on the same night, that a large stone casket, containing these bones, had been lying, ever since the miraculous occurrence took place, at the bottom of the Sea of Tiberias. Having perfect confidence in the celestial vision, they repaired thither with all possible expedition, and found it even as it had been told them; but not having sufficient strength to waft the inestimable burden to its destination, they invoked the aid of St Balæna, a whale of the fair sex, the foundress of the now widely-spread order of bottle-nosed hermitesses, by whom it was transported to the cathedral of St Granchio, and the bones distributed as before described. On their way homeward, St Muræna was unfortunately caught by a fisherman in the service of Henry I., king of England; and it is believed to have been as a punishment for having feasted on the holy damsel, that his majesty died immediately afterwards of an indigestion, 1st December 1135, (vide Chron. Henric I., p. 172, and Bayle, art. St Muræna.) St Rhomba was so deeply affected by the unfortunate fate of her beloved companion, that she retired to the Gulf of Florida, and established the convent of female turbots, to which allusion has already been made, where she died in odour of sanctity, an. 1174.— (Lanfranc. de gestis sanct. Pisc., vol. iv. p. 19, ed. Ven. 1643.) The distinctive badge of the nuns of that celebrated institution is a small cross of coral, fastened by a band of twisted seaweed between the anal and caudal fins. St Balæna lived in her hermitage to the great age of 119; and all the three are believed, on the authority of Sigonius, Joseph Scaliger, and Petavius, to have been changed into stars, and to occupy a prominent place in the constellation Pisces. The bull for their canonization was ordered to be drawn up in 1590 by the excellent Pope Urban VII. (Castagna), the successor of Sixtus V.; but as he was prematurely cut off after a brief reign of three weeks, his holy and wise in

tentions were carried into effect by his successor, Gregory XIV. (Sfondrati); and although no day is dedicated to their honour in the ordinary Romish calendar, so much respect is paid to them in his holiness' submarine dominions (which have never been tainted by Protestant heresy), that the first of April has been set apart for their worship, and is observed with particular strictness in the Black Sea, and in the Straits of Babelmandel.

III. ON BAPTISM.

THE second sacrament, which both Papists and Protestants observe in common, is that of Baptism; and it appears to me, that not only by the former, but by most Episcopalians also, the nature and importance of this institution have been magnified and overrated, in order to augment the amount of "power and holiness" supposed to be inherent in the priesthood, by whom it is administered. There have of late, on the other side of the Tweed, been many bitter controversies, as well as an unseemly and expensive lawsuit, in regard to the question of baptismal regeneration-a doctrine, as to which there is a wide and palpable difference of opinion amongst not only the highest living authorities, but the most distinguished authors belonging to former ages, who have been the props and ornaments of the Anglican Church. At present there seems to be a preponderance of opinion (at least amongst the bishops) in favour of this principle; although it is concurrently repudiated by many very eminent divines, who dogmatically differ from each other on many other points of great importance. Arnold, who abhorred the evangelical party, and Bickersteth, who, in that section of the church, was revered as one of its holiest leaders, are equally opposed, on this subject, to a great majority of the Episcopal bench.