Toaster's Handbook: Jokes, Stories, and QuotationsHarold Workman Williams H.W. Wilson, 1916 - 483 pages |
From inside the book
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Page 13
... minutes and made a great hit . Then it was Mr. Depew's turn . " Mr. Toastmaster and Ladies and Gentlemen , " said the famous raconteur as he arose , " Before this dinner Mark Twain and myself made an agreement to trade speeches . He has ...
... minutes and made a great hit . Then it was Mr. Depew's turn . " Mr. Toastmaster and Ladies and Gentlemen , " said the famous raconteur as he arose , " Before this dinner Mark Twain and myself made an agreement to trade speeches . He has ...
Page 28
... minutes passed ; but it didn't come . Twenty , thirty , and an hour - still no regiment . The aide came tearing back hatless , breathless . " My regiment ! My regiment ! Where is it ? Where is it ? " shrieked the commander . " General ...
... minutes passed ; but it didn't come . Twenty , thirty , and an hour - still no regiment . The aide came tearing back hatless , breathless . " My regiment ! My regiment ! Where is it ? Where is it ? " shrieked the commander . " General ...
Page 38
... minute , George , " she said . " I'm afraid we will have to go down again . " " What's wrong ? " asked her husband . " I believe I have dropped one of the pearl buttons off my jacket . I think I can see it glistening on the ground ...
... minute , George , " she said . " I'm afraid we will have to go down again . " " What's wrong ? " asked her husband . " I believe I have dropped one of the pearl buttons off my jacket . I think I can see it glistening on the ground ...
Page 43
... minute explanation , some inkling of the situation seemed to be dawning on the farmer's mind . Much encouraged , the president said : " You understand now how it is , don't you , Mr. Schmidt ? " " I t'ink I do , " admitted Mr. Schmidt ...
... minute explanation , some inkling of the situation seemed to be dawning on the farmer's mind . Much encouraged , the president said : " You understand now how it is , don't you , Mr. Schmidt ? " " I t'ink I do , " admitted Mr. Schmidt ...
Page 44
... minute elapses . Thus the " endorsement " : " Many thanks , dear , I've got the money . Your loving wife , Evelyn . " FRIEND " So you're going to make it hot for that fellow who held up the bank , shot the cashier , and got away with ...
... minute elapses . Thus the " endorsement " : " Many thanks , dear , I've got the money . Your loving wife , Evelyn . " FRIEND " So you're going to make it hot for that fellow who held up the bank , shot the cashier , and got away with ...
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ain't American answered asked better bill Bishop boss called chickens church darky daughter dear dinner doctor dollars door Douglas Jerrold drink Edmond Rostand Ellis Parker Butler England town exclaimed eyes father gentleman George George Washington GERTRUDE ATHERTON give hand head heard honor husband inquired Irishman Johnny joke judge lady laugh lawyer little boy little girl live look Lord Mark Twain marriage married mince pie minister Miss morning mother Nat Goodwin negro never nigger night once play preacher remarked replied Riggs Bank Scotsman seat Senator sense of humor smile speaker speech story suffragette sure talking teacher tell there's things thought told Tommy took town turned Uncle voice wait waiter walk weather in London Welsh rabbit What's wife Willie woman York young