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trustee-and she had prepared a number of questions for me to ask the candidates. I took the paper slyly out of my pocket with my handkerchief, and placing it on the table, out of sight of the females, I boldly began: "Miss Hale, spell Phthisic ”—I knew that used to be an awful hard word when I was a shaver. By Jericho, if she didn't spell it right through at once, as slick as a whistle. "Spell hymn," I continued. "What him?" said Miss Hale, blushing. "The forty-ninth," I answered. "Oh!" she replied, smiling a little, I thought—and then went through the word as if she had been singing it all her life. "Spell Sam," I cried out, scowling, to let her see I was not to be trifled with. She blushed more than before; and the blacksmith, one of the trustees, called out, "It is shameful-it is too bad-" and said he would not sit there and have a lady's feelings hurt before his eyes. He declared his determination to defend the rights of all unprotected females. (The blacksmith was formerly one of the "chivalry," but since the other party has come into power he has turned blacksmith; and I must say that from the time he left off loafing and began to work, I have felt a real respect for him.) "What on airth are you driving at?" said I. "I didn't know his cristen name was Sam. I scorn to be personal. I meant for this highly respectable young lady to spell psalm, the 119th psalm, no particular metre." "It will take her a long time to spell through that psalm," remarked the minister. However, she did spell it in a twinkling, without the smallest mistake.

Next, we had an exercise in pronunciation. "Artickerlate distinctly," said I, "the word constertooshional." They all spoke it pretty well. "Now," said I again, "say unconstertooshonal "—I noticed that two females pronounced the word unconstertooshonal with much more emphasis than they did the other. I did not like the appearance of things, so I made them all repeat in a loud voice, "Liberty and Union, now and forever, one and inseparable," which they did to my entire satisfaction. "Now," I continued, addressing Miss Hale, "can you say National Intelligencer?" The words were no sooner out of my mouth than she repeated them as glibly as possible, adding to them, of her own accord, Sacramento Union and California Teacher. I had on my paper some Russian words which Priscilla had written down for me-such as Petro

pavlovsk, Okhotsk, Alexandrovskoi, etc., etc., but I thought I would not give them. (Between you and I, I shouldn't have made much of a hand, pronouncing them myself.) Besides, I had heard of the man in San Francisco who put his jaw out of joint, trying to introduce some Russian officers to certain belles of your city at your grand ball, and so I mercifully desisted. The last time I was in your city, I had an ague in the face for a week after introducing to a friend of mine the Russian Consul, Count Contracostameetinghouskiof.

I thought I would then try them some in Geography. "Where," I asked, "is the leaning tower of Pison? Which way does it slant, and how much is it slantindicular?" "Perhaps you mean Peesa," remarked Miss Hale. I glanced at my paper. "Sartin," said I, "I don't mean nothing else." "It used to lean Sow or Sow-West," observed one Miss with a highly tanned complexion, who had lately come round the "Horn," "but within a year or two, like many other things, it has taken a decided slant towards the North." 66 Spoken like a true American heroine," was my remark upon this answer. "I think the inclination is 12 feet from the perpendicular," said a female from Connecticut. "That

is not accurate," exclaimed a woman with thin, compressed lips and a projecting forehead, "the deviation is exactly 12 feet, 4 inches. What's the use of stating facts if they a'n't facts?" In reply to my inquiry, she told me she had been born and brought up in Boston—and then, of course, I pronounced her answer mathematically correct; and indeed she was so positive that if I had had any opinion of my own (which I hadn't), I should not have dared to express it. I could not help thinking, however, how much more easy and comfortable I was at home with my darling little wife Priscilla, who, though she does know a heap more than I do and does pretty much as she pleases, yet has a way of making me think I am the lord and master of my household, which is, I must say, very agreeable to my feelings. She follows the decision of that eminently sound Judge who said that "in the eye of the law husband and wife are one, and that the husband is that one."

"What recently discovered land can you mention?" All failed to answer except Miss Hale, who said, when her turn came, that the question was very easy and the answer obvious; it was-New

foundland. The whole committee were struck at once with the correctness and brilliancy of the reply. "Where is the Isle of Beauty?" I next inquired. No one could tell but Miss Hale, who answered promptly that I must mean Belle Isle near the Gulf of St. Lawrence. I very eagerly told her that I had no doubt of it. I proceeded. "Where is Cape Disappointment?" Most thought it was very close by the Board of Trustees. "Where," I went on rapidly, "are Porcupine River, Lake Caniapuscaw, Prescott, Liberty, any Jackson, New Palmyra, Modern Troy, Onion Creek, Homer, Smithopolis, Scipiotown, Scienceville Centre, Nijuii Novorod, Great and Little Egg Harbor, Hohenzollern Sigmasingen, Red Shirt Tail Cañon, Pietermaritzburg, Big Muddy Stream"-"I decidedly object to these questions," interrupted the blacksmith, "and must express my surprise that a gentleman of the attainments and sense of propriety which I had attributed to my friend should propose such questions as some of these are to a collection of interesting young ladies. I move that the examination in Geography be now closed." The vote was taken, and as I did not care to make any opposition, it was carried in the affirmative.

My first question in arithmetic was, "What is a prime number?" The strong minded woman from the Athens of America (I like to be original) replied at once, "No. 1." 'Right," thundered the blacksmith, bringing his fist forcibly down upon the table," there never was a truer thing said." "What is a circulating decimal?" The most direct answer to this question was, " it is a ten cent postage stamp." "What is a mixed number?" "It is," said one rather prim female, "when a number of people get mixed up together quite permiskersly, as it were, and as is never allowed in no select party, which are only such as I will attend, and which you need not therefore to invite me to go to any others." "What is an improper fraction?" "I object to that question," exclaimed the blacksmith, jumping up; "there is impropriety manifest in the mere statement of the question; it is obvious that the answer cannot be proper to a question which relates to an impropriety. I am amazed that respectable authors of treatises on arithmetic will allow such questions in their works. Where," he asked, "where, alas! can we look for pure morality, if we find it not in our Common School Arithmetics? I hope the gentleman will withdraw the

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question." After some further solicitation, I yielded to his earnest request, and proceeded as follows: "What is reduction ascending?" One very young Miss thought it must be a man going up in a balloon, and becoming small by degrees and beautifully less." I gave her such a frown that she did not answer another question. "Now," said I, very impressively, "prepare all your energies to answer this question: If 13 men can dig a ditch 2 feet wide, 3,1 inches long, and 991 feet deep-No, stop-I have got the wrong problem-I have made a mistake. This is the question I wish you to answer: If 44 men eat, every day, each, 2 pounds of beef, 2 pounds of bread, of a pound of vegetables, and drink 2 cups of coffee, 3 cups of tea, and a pint of milk, what is the cost of supporting an army of 199,000 men, where meat is $1 75 a pound, flour $60 a barrel, boots $65 the pair, caps $17 apiece, jackets and pants $101, vegetables scarce, and there is no tea and coffee, and they ha n't got no shirts at all? Solve by any proportion you please." Miss Hale was the only one who obtained the right answer, and I am afraid to mention the frightful amount.

I have only space to tell you that we concluded with an interesting collection of general questions, such as: "Where were you born? Where do you come from? What are you about? What may I call your age? At how many schools have you finished your edication? Can Can you teach Callysthenicks? If so, which? Do you warble? How many musical instruments do you play on? If elected, do you mean to get married as soon as you can and leave us, or how otherwise? Are you in favor of capital punishment for children? If so, state how, when, where, under what circumstances, wherefore, and to what eend? If there is anything you know, which you think the Committee ought to know that you know, and which you are desirous to make known, tell all that you know, as fully and particularly as if specially interrogated thereto." I got this last from lawyer B, of our town, who is to be our future member of Congress. He said it was a real experiment crucis-meaning it would fetch them if anything could. I give this quotation as a specimen to show how thorough our examination was.

All declined giving their ages except Miss Hale, who said that if permitted, she would reply by proposing to the Committee a problem, the answer to which would be her age. We were all nearly

petrified at her daring, and before we could recover from the shock of surprise, this courageous lady continued: "Take 2 years from my age, extract the square root of the remainder, multiply the root by 2, extract the cube root of the product, multiply this root by 9, the result will be my age." We have been trying ever since to find out that young woman's age, but all in vain. I can give you no idea of the distress of mind I have suffered, worrying to find the answer. I get all sorts of results-I suppose because women's ages are mighty uncertain. The minister thinks the question may be solved by a Different Calculus, and I think it must be a different calculus from any I can make that will come anywhere near correct. One thing I have learnt, and that is, never to ask a woman's age again as long as I live.

The examination being finished, we proceeded to vote, and Miss Hale was unanimously chosen our teacher vive vose, every member of the Committee manifesting his preference for her by rising all together, and there was no nem con, as we say in our debating club.

The next thing in order was to administer the oath of allegiance. "Swear her," said the blacksmith to the Justice, " and don't let her go." And when that fair maiden rose, and lifting her lily-white hand and her dark eyes to heaven, promised to bear true faith, allegiance, and loyalty to this glorious country-it was more than beautiful-it was thrilling. She looked so pure, so heroic, so holy, that, for all the world, she brought vividly to my mind Priscilla's face and expression when she vowed to love, honor, and obey your humble servant. When Miss Hale solemnly swore that she would faithfully support, protect, and defend the Constitution and Government of the United States, I saw the blacksmith double up his fist, and I noticed a flash in his eye that said plainly, "You may do the swearing, Miss; but as for the fighting, you call on me," and I knew that from that moment he was converted into a sound Union man. When she came to kiss the book, he was entirely overcome, and I saw that the triumph of patriotism was complete.

The Chairman pronounced her entirely qualified for the position, and then administered a long lecture on the way in which she must do everything. I would'nt have such a talking to for a great deal. I really pitied the poor girl, and I suppose she saw