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Your nails be pick'd from filth, and even par'd;
Nor let your nasty nostrils bud with beard.
Cure your unsav'ry breath, gargle your throat,
And free your armpits from the ram and goat.
Dress not, in short, too little or too much;
And be not wholly French, nor wholly Dutch.
Now Bacchus calls me to his jolly rites;
Who would not follow, when a god invites ?
He helps the poet, and his pen inspires,
Kind and indulgent to his former fires.

Fair Ariadne wander'd on the shore,
Forsaken now; and Theseus loved no more:
Loose was her gown, dishevell'd was her hair;
Her bosom naked, and her feet were bare:
Exclaiming on the water's brink she stood;
Her briny tears augment the briny flood.
She shriek'd, and wept, and both became her
face:

No posture could that heav'nly form disgrace. She beat her breast: The traitor's gone, said she;

What shall become of poor forsaken me?

But thou, when flowing cups in triumph ride, And the lov'd nymph is seated by thy side; Invoke the god, and all the mighty pow'rs, That wine may not defraud thy genial hours. Then in ambiguous words thy suit prefer, Which she may know were all addrest to her, In liquid purple letters write her name, Which she may read, and reading find the flame. Then may your eyes confess your mutual fires, (For eyes have tongues,and glances tell desires ;) Whene'er she drinks, be first to take the cup; And, where she laid her lips, the blessing sup. When she to carving does her hand advance, Put out thy own, and touch it as by chance. Thy service e'en her husband must attend: (A husband is a most convenient friend.) Seat the fool cuckold in the highest place: And with thy garland his dull temples grace. Whether below or equal in degree, Let him be load of all the company,

And what he says be seconded by thee. [name: "T is common to deceive through friendship's

What shall become she had not time for But, common though it be, 't is still to blame:

more,

The sounding cymbals rattled on the shore.
She swoons for fear, she falls upon the ground;
No vital heat was in her body found.
The Mimallonian dames about her stood;
And scudding satyrs ran before their god.
Silenus on his ass did next appear,
And held upon the mane, (the god was clear;)
The drunken sire pursues, the dames retire;
Sometimes the drunken dames pursue the drunk-
en sire.

At last he topples over on the plain;
The satyrs laugh, and bid him rise again.
And now the god of wine came driving on,
High on his chariot by swift tigers drawn,
Her colour, voice, and sense forsook the fair;
Thrice did her trembling feet for flight prepare,
And thrice affrighted did her flight forbear.
She shook, like leaves of corn when tempests
blow,

Or slender reeds that in the marshes grow.
To whom the god: Compose thy fearful mind;
In me a truer husband thou shalt find.
With heaven I will endow thee, and thy star
Shall with propitious light be seen afar,
And guide on seas the doubtful mariner.
He said, and from his chariot leaping light,
Lest the grim tigers should the nymph affright,
His brawny arms around her waist he threw ;
(For gods, whate'er they will, with ease can do:)
And swiftly bore her thence: th' attending
throng

Shout at the sight, and sing the nuptial song.
Now in full bowls her sorrow she may steep:
The bridegroom's liquor lays the bride asleep.

Thus factors frequently their trust betray, And to themselves their masters' gains convey. Drink to a certain pitch, and then give o'er; Thy tongue and feet may stumble,drinking more. Of drunken quarrels in her sight beware; Pot-valour only serves to fright the fair. Eurytion justly fell, by wine opprest, For his rude riot at a wedding-feast. Sing, if you have a voice; and show your parts In dancing, if endu'd with dancing arts. Do any thing within your power to please; Nay, e'en affect a seeming drunkenness ; Clip ev'ry word; and if by chance you speak Too home, or if too broad-a jest you break, In your excuse the company will join, And lay the fault upon the force of wine. True drunkenness is subject to offend; But when 't is feign'd 't is oft a lover's friend. Then safely you may praise her beauteous face, And call him happy, who is in her grace. Her husband thinks himself the man design'd; But curse the cuckold in your secret mind. When all are risen, and prepare to go, Mix with the crowd, and tread upon her toe This is the proper time to make thy court, For now she's in the vein, and fit for sport. Lay bashfulness, that rustic virtue, by; To manly confidence thy thoughts apply. On Fortune's foretop timely fix thy hold; Now speak and speed, for Venus loves the bold. No rules of rhetoric here I need afford : Only begin, and trust the following word; It will be witty of its own accord.

Act well the lover; let thy speech abound In dying words, that represent thy wound

Distrust not her belief; she will be mov'd;
All women think they merit to be lov'd.
Sometimes a man begins to love in jest,
And, after, feels the torment he profest.
For your own sakes be pitiful, ye fair;
For a feign'd passion may a true prepare.
By flatteries we prevail on womankind;
As hollow banks by streams are undermin❜d.
Tell her, her face is fair, her eyes are sweet:
Her taper fingers praise, and little feet.
Such praises e'en the chaste are pleas'd to hear;
Both maids and matrons hold their beauty dear.
Once naked Pallas with Jove's queen ap-
pear'd;

And still they grieve that Venus was preferr❜d.
Praise the proud peacock, and he spreads his
Be silent, and he pulls it in again. [train:
Pleas'd is the courser in his rapid race;
Applaud his running, and he mends his pace.
But largely promise, and devoutly swear;
And, if need be, call ev'ry god to hear.
Jove sits above, forgiving with a smile
The perjuries that easy maids beguile.
He swore to Juno by the Stygian lake :
Forsworn, he dares not an example make,
Or punish falsehood, for his own dear sake.
"T is for our interest that the gods should be;
Let us believe 'em: I believe, they see,
And both reward, and punish equally.
Not that they live above like lazy drones,
Or kings below, supine upon their thrones.
Lead then your lives as present in their sight;
Be just in dealings, and defend the right;
By fraud betray not, nor oppress by might.
But 't is a venial sin to cheat the fair;
All men have liberty of conscience there.
On cheating nymphs a cheat is well design'd;
'T is a profane and a deceitful kind.

"T is said, that Egypt for nine years was dry,
Nor Nile did floods, nor heav'n did rain supply.
A foreigner at length inform'd the king, [bring.
That slaughter'd guests would kindly moisture
The king replied: On thee the lot shall fall;
Be thou, my guest, the sacrifice for all.
Thus Phalaris Perillus taught to low,
And made him season first the brazen cow.
A rightful doom, the laws of nature cry,
"T is, the artificers of death should die.
Thus justly women suffer by deceit;
Their practice authorizes us to cheat.
Beg her, with tears, thy warm desires to grant;
For tears will pierce a heart of adamant.
If tears will not be squeez'd, then rub your eye,
Or 'noint the lids, and seem at least to cry.
Kiss, if you can: resistance if she make,
And will not give you kisses, let her take.
Fy, fy, you naughty man, are words of course;
She struggles but to be subdu'd by force.

Kiss only soft, I charge you, and beware,
With your hard bristles not to brush the fair.
He who has gain'd a kiss, and gains no more,
Deserves to lose the bliss he got before.
If once she kiss, her meaning is exprest;
There wants but little pushing for the rest :
Which if thou dost not gain, by strength or art,
The name of clown then suits with thy desert;
'T is downright dulness, and a shameful part.
Perhaps, she calls it force; but if she 'scape,
She will not thank you for the omitted rape.
The sex is cunning to conceal their fires;
They would be forc'd e'en to their own desires.
They seem t' accuse you, with a downcast
sight,

But in their souls confess you did them right.
Who might be forc'd, and yet untouch'd depart,
Thank with their tongues, but curse you with
their heart.

Fair Phoebe and her sister did prefer
To their dull mates the noble ravisher.

What Deidamia did, in days of yore,
The tale is old, but worth the reading o'er.
When Venus had the golden apple gain'd,
And the just judge fair Helen had obtain’d:
When she with triumph was at Troy receiv'd,
The Trojans joyful while the Grecians griev'd:
They vow'd revenge of violated laws,
And Greece was arming in the cuckold's cause:
Achilles, by his mother warn'd from war,
Disguis'd his sex, and lurk'd among the fair,
What means Ecides to spin and sew?
With spear and sword in field thy valour show;
And, leaving this, the nobler Pallas know.
Why dost thou in that hand the distaff wield,
Which is more worthy to sustain the shield?
Or with that other draw the woolly twine,
The same the fates for Hector's thread assign?
Brandish thy falchion in thy pow'rful hand,
Which can alone the pond'rous lance command.
In the same room by chance the royal maid
Was lodg'd, and, by his seeming sex betray'd,
Close to her side the youthful hero laid.
I know not how his courtship he began;
But, to her cost, she found it was a man.
'Tis thought she struggled; but withal 't is
thought,

Her wish was to be conquer'd, when she fought
For when disclos'd, and hast'ning to the field,
He laid his distaff down, and took the shield,
With tears her humble suit she did prefer,
And thought to stay the grateful ravisher.
She sighs, she sobs, she begs him not to part:
And now 't is nature, what before was art.
She strives by force her lover to detain,
And wishes to be ravish'd once again.
This is the sex, they will not first begin,
But when compell'd, are pleas'd to suffer sin.

Is there, who thinks that women first should woo?

I.ay by thy self-conceit, thou foolish beau.
Begin, and save their modesty the shame;
'T is well for thee, if they receive thy flame.
"T is decent for a man to speak his mind;
They but expect th' occasion to be kind.
Ask, that thou mayst enjoy; she waits for this;
And on thy first advance depends thy bliss.
E'en Jove himself was forc'd to sue for love;
None of the nymphs did first solicit Jove.
But if you find your prayers increase her pride,
Strike sail a while, and wait another tide.
They fly when we pursue; but make delay,
And, when they see you slacken, they will stay.
Sometimes it profits to conceal your end;
Name not yourself her lover, but her friend.
How many skittish girls have thus been caught?
He prov'd a lover, who a friend was thought.

Sailors by sun and wind are swarthy made; A tann'd complexion best becomes their trade. "T is a disgrace to ploughmen to be fair; Bluff cheeks they have, and weather-beaten hair.

Th' ambitious youth, who seeks an olive crown,
Is sun-burnt with his daily toil and brown.
But if the lover hopes to be in grace,
Wan be his looks, and meager be his face.
That colour from the fair compassion draws:
She thinks you sick, and thinks herself the cause.
Orion wander'd in the woods for love:
His paleness did the nymphs to pity move;
His ghastly visage argued hidden love.
Nor fail a nightcap, in full health, to wear;
Neglect thy dress, and discompose thy hair.
All things are decent, that in love avail:
Read long by night, and study to be pale:
Forsake your food, refuse your needful rest;
Be miserable, that you may be blest.

Shall I complain, or shall I warn you most?
Faith, truth, and friendship in the world are lost;
A little and an empty name they boast.
Trust not thy friend, much less thy mistress
praise:

If he believe, thou mayst a rival raise.
'T is true, Patroclus, by no lust misled,
Sought not to stain his dear companion's bed.
Nor Pylades Hermione embrac'd;
E'en Phædra to Pirithous stili was chaste.
But hope not thou, in this vile age, to find
Those rare examples of a faithful mind.
The sea shall sooner with sweet ho..ey •
Or from the furzes pears and apples grow.
We sin with gust, we love by fraud to gai:
And find a pleasure in our felka s pain.
From rival foes you may the fair defend;
But, would you ward the blow, beware your
friend:

Beware your brother, and your next of kin ;
But from your bosom-friend your care begin.
Here I had ended, but experience finds,
That sundry women are of sundry milds;
With various crotchets fill'd, and hard to please.
They therefore must be caught by various ways.
All things are not produc'd in any soil;
This ground for wine is proper, that for oil.
So 't is in men, but more in womankind :
Different in face, in manners, and in mind:
But wise men shift their sails with every wind:
As changeful Proteus varied oft his shape,
And did in sundry forms and figures 'scape
A running stream, a standing tree became,
A roaring lion, or a bleating lamb.
Some fish with harpoons, some with darts are
struck,
[hook:
Some drawn with nets, some hang upon the
So turn thyself; and imitating them,
Try several tricks, and change thy stratagem.
One rule will not for different ages hold;
The jades grow cunning, as they grow more old.
Then talk not bawdy to the bashful maid:
Broad words will make her innocence afraid.
Nor to an ignorant girl of learning speak
She thinks you conjure, when you talk in Greek.
And hence 't is often seen, the simple shun
The learn'd, and into vile embraces run.

Part of my task is done, and part to do,
But here 't is time to rest myself and you

FROM OVID'S AMOURS.

BOOK I. ELEG. I.

FOR mighty wars I thought to tune my lute,
And make my measures to my subject suit.
Six feet for ev'ry verse the Muse design'd:
But Cupid, laughing, when he saw my mind
From ev'ry second verse a foot purloin'.
Who gave thee, boy, this arbitrary sway,
On subjects, not thy own, commands to lay,
Who Phoebus only and his laws obey?
"T is more absurd than if the Queen of Love
Should in Minerva's arm to battle move;
Or manly Pallas from that een should take
Her torch, and o'er the Zying lover shake,
In fielas as we may Cynthia sow the corn,
Or Ceree wind in woods the bugle-horn
As we may rhœbus quit the trembling string,
For read and shield; and Mars may learn to
A.ready thy dominions are too large; [sing.
Be not ambitious of a foreign charge.
If thou wilt reign o'er all, and every where,
The god of music for his harp may fear.
Thus when with soaring wings I seek renown,
Thou pluck'st my pinions and I flutter down

Could I on such mean thoughts my muse em-
I want a mistress or a blooming boy. [ploy,
Thus I complain'd: his bow the stripling bent,
And chose an arrow fit for his intent.
The shaft his purpose fatally pursues;
Now, poet, there's a subject for thy musc.
He said: too well, alas, he knows his trade;
For in my breast a mortal wound he made.
Far hence, ye proud hexameters, remove,
My verse is pac'd and trammel'd into love.
With myrtle wreaths my thoughtful brows en-
close,

While in unequal verse I sing my woes.

FROM OVID'S AMOURS.

BOOK I. ELEG. IV.

To his mistress, whose husband is invited to a feast with them. The poet instructs her how to behave herself in his company.

YOUR husband will be with us at the treat;
May that be the last supper ho shall eat.
And am poor I a guest invited there,
Only to see, while he may touch the fair?
To see you kiss and hug your nauseous lord,
While his lewd hand descends below the board?
Now wonder not that Hippodamia's charms,
At such a sight, the Centaurs urg'd to arms;
That in a rage they threw their cups aside,
Assail'd the bridegroom, and would force the
bride.

I am not half a horse, (I would I were,)
Yet hardly can from you my hands forbear.
Take then my counsel; which observ'd may be
Of some importance both to you and me.
Be sure to come before your man be there;
There's nothing can be done; but come howe'er,
Sit next him (that belongs to decency)
But tread upon my foot in passing by.
Read in my looks what silently they speak,
And slyly, with your eyes, your answer make
My lifted eyebrow shall declare my pain;
My right hand to his fellow shall complain;
And on the back a letter shall design;
Besides a note that shall be writ in wine.
Whene'er you think upon our last embrace,
With your fore-finger gently touch your face.
If any word of mine offend my dear,
Pull, with your hand, the velvet of your ear.
If you are pleas'd with what I do or say,
Handle your rings, or with your fingers play.
As suppliants use at altars, hold the board,
Whene'er you wish the devil may take your

Jord.

When he fills for you never touch the cup,
But bid th' officious cuckold drink it up.
The waiter on those services employ:
Drink you, and I will snatch it from the boy;
Watching the part where your sweet mouth
hath been,

And thence with eager lips will suck it in.
If he, with clownish manners, thinks it fit
To taste, and offer you the nasty bit,
Reject his greasy kindness, and restore
Th' unsav'ry morsel he had chew'd before.
Nor let his arms embrace your neck, nor rest
Your tender cheek upon his hairy breast.
Let not his hand within your bosom stray,
And rudely with your pretty bubbies play.
But above all, let him no kiss receive;
That's an offence I never can forgive.
Do not, O do not that sweet mouth resign,
Lest I rise up in arms, and cry, 'T is mine.
I shall thrust in betwixt, and void of fear
The manifest adulterer will appear.
These things are plain to sight; but more I
doubt

What you conceal beneath your petticoat.
Take not his leg between your tender thighs,
Nor with your hand, provoke my foe to rise.
How many love-inventions I deplore,
Which I myself have practis'd all before?
How oft have I been forc'd the robe to lift
In company; to make a homely shift
For a bare bout, ill huddled o'er in haste,
While o'er my side the fair her mantle cast.
You to your husband shall not be so kind :
But, lest you should, your mantle leave behind
Encourage him to tope; but kiss him not,
Nor mix one drop of water in his pot.
If he be fuddled well, and snores apace,
Then we may take advice from time and place
When all depart, when compliments are loud,
Be sure to mix among the thickest crowd:
There I will be, and there we cannot miss,
Perhaps to grubble, or at least to kiss.
Alas! what length of labour I employ,
Just to secure a short and transient joy! [come
For night must part us: and when night is
Tuck'd underneath his arm he leads you home
He locks you in; I follow to the door,
His fortune envy, and my own deplore.
He kisses you, he more than kisses too,
Th' outrageous cuckold thinks it all is due.
But add not to his joy by your consent,
And let it not be given, but only lent.
Return no kiss, nor move in any sort;
Make it a dull and a malignant sport.
Had I my wish, he should no pleasure take,
But slubber o'er your business for my sake.
And whate 'er fortune shall this night befall,
Coax me to morrow, by forswearing all.

FROM OVID'S AMOURS.

BOOK II. ELEG. XIX

What comes with ease, we nauseously receive,
Who, but a sot, would scorn to love with leave?
With hopes and fears my flames are blown up
higher ?

Make me despair, and then I can desire.
Give me a jilt to tease my jealous mind;
Deceits are virtues in the female kind.
Corinna my fantastic humour knew,
Play'd trick for trick, and kept herself still new:
She, that next night I might the sharper come,
Fell out with me, aud sent me fasting home;
Or some pretence to lie alone would take;
Whene'er she pleas'd, her head and teeth would
Till having won me to the highest strain, [ache:
She took occasion to be sweet again.
With what a gust, ye gods, we then embrac'd!
How ev'ry kiss was dearer than the last!
Thou whom I now adore, be edified,
Take care that I may often be denied.
Forget the promis'd hour, or feign some fright,
Make me lie rough on bulks each other night.
These are the arts that best secure thy reign,
And this the food, that must my fires maintain.
Gross easy love does, like gross diet, pall,
In squeasy stomachs honey turns to gall.
Had Danaë not been kept in brazen tow'rs,
Jove had not thought her worth his golden
show'rs.

When Juno to a cow turn'd lo's shape,
The watchman help'd her to a second leap.

shore.

The jilting harlot strikes the surest blow,
A truth which I by sad experience know.
The kind poor constant creature we despise;
Man but pursues the quarry while it flies.

But thou, dull husband of a wife too fair, Stand on thy guard, and watch the precious

ware;

If creaking doors, or barking dogs thou hear,
Or windows scratch'd, suspect a rival there.
An orange wench would tempt thy wife a-
broad;

Kick her, for she 's a letter-bearing bawd;
In short, be jealous as the devil in hell!
And set my wit on work to cheat thee well.
The sneaking city-cuckold is my foe,

I scorn to strike, but when he wards the blow.'
Look to thy hits, and leave off thy conniving
I'll be no drudge to any wittal living;
I have been patient, and forborne thee long,
In hope thou wouldst not pocket up thy wrong:
If no affront can rouse thee, understand
I'll take no more indulgence at thy hand.
What, ne'er to be forbid thy house, and wife!
Damn him who loves to lead so ill a life,
Now I can neither sigh, nor whine, nor pray,
All those occasions thou hast ta'en away.
Why art thou so incorrigibly civil?

Do somewhat I may wish thee at the devil.
For shame be no accomplice in my treason,
A pimping husband is too much in reason.

Once more wear horns, before I quite forsake her,

In hopes whereof, I rest thy cuckold-maker.

TRANSLATIONS FROM JUVENAL.

THE FIRST SATIRE OF JUVENAL.

THE ARGUMENT

The poet gives us first a kind of humorous reason for his writing: That being provoked by hearing so many ill poets rehearse their works, he does himself justice on them, by giving them as bad as they bring. But since no man will rank himself with ill writers, 't is easy to conclude, that if such wretches could draw an audience, he thought it no hard matter to excel them, and gain a greater es. teem with the public. Next he informs us more openly, why he rather addicts himself to satire, than any other kind of poetry. And here he discovers that it is not so much his indignation to ill poets, as to ill men, which has prompted him to write. He therefore gives us a summary and general view of the vices and follies reigning in his time. So that this first satire is the natural ground

work of all the rest. Herein he confines himself to no one subject, but strikes indifferently at all men in his way in every following satire he has chosen some particular moral which he would inculcate; and lashes some particular vice or fol. ly, (an art with which our lampooners are not much acquainted.) But our poet being desirous to reform his own age, and not daring to attempt it by an overt act of naming living persons, invighs only against those who were infamous in the times immediately preceding his, whereby he not only gives a fair warning to great men, that their memory lies at the mercy of future poets and historians, but also with a finer stroke of his pen brands even the living, and personates them under dead men's names.

I have avoided as much as I could possibly the borrowed learning of marginal notes and illustra tions, and for that reason have translated this satire somewhat largely. And freely own (if it be a fault) that I have likewise omitted most of

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