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CUT the name of the man who his mistress deny'd,
And let the first of it be only apply'd
To join with the prophet + who David did chide;
Then fay what a horse is that runs very fast ‡;
And that which deferves to be firft put the last;
Spell all then, and put them together, to find
The Name and the Virtues of him I defign'd.
Like the Patriarch in Egypt, he 's vers'd in the state;
Like the Prophet in Jewry, he 's free with the great;
Like a racer he flies, to fuccour with speed,
When his friends want his aid, or defert is in need.
THE DEAN'S ANSWER.
THIE nymph who wrote this in an amorous fit,
I cannot but envy the pride of her wit,
Which thus fhe will venture profufely to throw
On fo mean a defign, and a subjećt so low.
For mean 's her defign, and her fubject as mean,
The firft but a Rebus, the laft but a Dean.
A Dean's but a parfon : and what is a Rebus?
A thing never known to the Mufes or Phoebus.
The corruption of verfe; for, when all is done,
It is but a paraphraje made on a pun.
But a genius like her's no fubject can ftifle,
It fhews and difcovers itself through a trifle.
By reading this trifle, I quickly began
To find her a great wit, but the dean a small man.
Rich ladies will furnish their garrets with stuff,
Which others for mantuas would think fine enough:
So the wit that is lavishly thrown away here
Might furnish a fecond-rate poet a year.
Thus much for the verfe, we proceed to the next,
Where the Nymph has entirely forfaken her text :
Her fine panegyricks are quite out of season,
And what he defcribes to be merit is treafon :
The changes, which faction has made in the state,
Have put the dean's politicks quite out of date :
Now no one regards what he utters with freedom,
And, fhould he write pamphlets, no great man would
And should want or desert stand in need of his aid,
This racer would prove but a dull-founder'd jade.
HORACE, B. II. ODE I. PARAPHRASED. Addreffed to RICHARD STEELE, Efq. 1714.
"En qui promittit cives, urbem fibi curæ, "Imperium fore, & Italiam, & delubra deɔrum.” HOR. 1 Sat. vi. 34.
DICK, thou 't refolv'd, as I am told,
Some ftrange arcana to unfold,
And, with the help of Buckley's pen,
To vamp the good old caufe again,
Which thou (fuch Burnet's fhrewd advice is) 5
Muft furbish up, and nickname Chifis.
Thou pompously wilt let us know
What all the world knew long ago,
(E'er fince Sir William Gore was mayor,
And Harley fill'd the Commons' chair)
That we a German Prince muft own
When Anne for heaven refigns her throne.
But, more than that, thou'lt keep a rout
With-who is in-and who is out,
Thou 'lt rail devoutly at the peace,
And all its fecret causes trace,
The bucket-play 'twixt Whigs and Tories,
Their ups and downs, with fifty stories
Of tricks the lord of Oxford knows,
And errors of our Plenipoes.
Thou 'lt tell of leagues among the great,
Portending ruin to our state;
And of that dreadful coup d'eclat,
Which has afforded thee much chat.
The Queen, forfooth (defpotic) gave
Twelve coronets without thy leave!
A breach of liberty, 'tis own'd,
For which no heads have yet aton'd!
Believe me, what thou'ft undertaken
May bring in jeopardy thy bacon;
For madmen, children, wits, and fools,
Should never meddle with edg'd tools.
But, fince thou 'rt got into the fire,
And canft not eafily retire,
Thou must no longer deal in farce,
Nor pump to cobble wicked verfe;
Until thou shalt have eas'd thy conscience,
Of spleen, of politicks, and nonsense;
And, when thou 'st bid adieu to cares,
And fettled Europe's grand affairs,
'Twill then, perhaps, be worth thy while
For Drury-Lane to shape thy style:
"To make a pair of jolly fellows,
"The fon and father, join to tell us,
"How fons may fafely disobey,
"And fathers never should say nay,
"By which wife conduct they grow friends
"At laft-and so the story ends *.”
When first I knew thee, Dick, thou wert
Renown'd for skill in Fauftus' art †,
Which made thy clofet much frequented
By buxom laffes-fome repented
Their lucklefs choice of husbands-others,
Impatient to be like their mothers,
Receiv'd from thee profound directions
How beft to fettle their affections.
Thus thou, a friend to the distress'd,
Didft in thy calling do thy best.
But now the Senate (if things hit
And thou at Stockbridge wert not bit)
* This is faid to be a plot of a comedy with which Mr. Steele has long threatened the town. In fome particulars it would apply to "The Confcious "Lovers."
There were fome tolerable grounds for this reflection. Mr. Steele had actually a laboratory at Poplar.
Muft feel thy eloquence and fire,
Approve thy fchemes, thy wit admire,
Thee with immortal honours crown,
Whilft, Patriot-like, thou 'lt ftrut and frown.
What though by enemies 'tis said,
The laurel, which adorns thy head,
Muft one day come in competition
By virtue of fome fly petition :
Yet mum for that; hope ftill the best,
Nor let fuch cares disturb thy reft.
Methinks I hear thee loud as trumpet,
As bagpipe fhrill, or oyfter-ftrumpet;
Methinks I fee thee, fpruce and fine,
With coat embroider'd richly fhine,
And dazzle all the idol-faces
As through the ball thy worship paces;
(Though this I fpeak but at a venture,
Suppofing thou haft tick with Hunter)
Methinks I fee a black-guard rout
Attend thy coach, and hear them fhout
In approbation of thy tongue,
Which (in their style) is purely hung,
Now! now you carry all before you!
Nor dares one Jacobite or Tory
Pretend to anfwer one fyllable,
Except the matchlefs hero Abel *.
What though her highness and her spouse
In Antwerp † keep a frugal houfe,
+ Where the duke of Marlborough then refided.